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Showing posts from September, 2007

Sexing The Ex...

Should you have sex with an ex? What are the pros & cons to having sex with an ex? Why do so many people have sex with their exes? For some sexing the ex is totally tabu ...after all, they are your ex for a reason. right? I've heard some people say that some of their best sex have been with their ex...is that really true or is it good because of the familiarity? Afterall, you may have been together for a while and it does take some getting used to a new partner...not saying it can't be done, but the ex knows you...he/she knows how you like to be touched, kissed, licked, carressed...stroked! Isn't easier to just go back to the known sometimes as opposed to exploring the unknown? I can think of a few pros and cons... Pro's : There are no expectations from either party other than to have a good time by engaging in unadulterated, steamy, sweaty, hot butt nekked sex. They are familiar with your body, they know what makes you tic! Curiosity- can he/she still take you the

Relationships: Inequality or Imbalance...

Are relationships equal? Does he/she give 50% to your 50% or are you in a 90/10, 80/20, or 70/30 situation and don't even know it? Did you think that your percentage was more or less? Did you think that the value you placed on the relationship was more important to you than the other person....meant more than just a friend? Were you spending alot of time together, then all of a sudden, no more phone calls, no more contact...and you feel as if you are on the chase again...like somewhere something went wrong...the balance of the relationship was skewed? Are you asking yourself what happened...were you an "STD" (something to do) or an "OAD" (one and done)? Someone asked me if I felt that there was an inequality in the male/female relationships. She stated that she was not happy with the current state of affairs of her relationships...she says she doesn't ask questions of the men she dates, although, they ask her questions. She says they make it known that she i

What is F R I E N D S H I P...

I have been pondering this recently...especially in the male/female realm. Is there a difference between being a friend and having a friend? Loving a friend and being in love with a friend, wanting a friend and needing a friend...I know that there are only a handful of people that I consider true friends and only one of them is a male the others are female...I know without a doubt that when I call they will answer...if I need them, they are there... I feel that friendships are interpersonal relationships of mutual affection, knowledge, and esteem. A friend is there for good times and bad times, with similar tastes and at times can show a loyalty, that for some may seem alturistic. In fact there is a value that should be placed on friendships...like the desire to see your friend do better...mutual understanding, and that straightforward honesty that you know only a true friend can and will say, even if at the time it hurts your feelings...but a true friend tells you the TRUTH out of lov

Clarity In The Quest For Love

I was dressing for work and this overwhelming feeling of devastation came over me…and the tears welled in my eyes and spilled over. I must’ve cried for an hour…until my face got puffy and my head ached…I cried all the way to work and off and on at my desk…as if that wasn’t bad enough, when I got home, I popped in THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY and cried again…if you haven’t seen this movie it is the ultimate in love and sacrifice… I believe that everyone should have a good cry it gets all of the stresses and toxins out of your system…crying is a catharsis that you have to actually have to understand what I am saying…but my cry stemmed from me loosing someone that I love, I cried for the time I lost…I cried for the love I gave…I cried for not being appreciate for the wonderful woman that I am…I cried because he doesn’t love me back…I cried because I know that moving on will be tough, but not impossible…I cried because I had made a commitment to meet some friends and I did not want to go,

Toxic Relationships

A reader asked me my thoughts on a toxic relationship...they asked not to post their letter, but to give my thoughts and to ask my readers what they think a toxic relationship is... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- DO NOT MAKE SOMEONE A PRIORITY IN YOU ARE LIFE, WHEN ALL YOU ARE IS AN OPTION TO THEM… This is at the base of a toxic relationship or toxic love…no longer is it healthy for you when your every waking thought is about someone that has no thoughts of you. I’m not talking about basic thoughts of safety, I feel we all have that for those in our circle, but thoughts of your happiness, daily wellbeing, future hopes, dreams, a person that believes in you wholeheartedly…so that you know without a doubt---they got you! Its toxic when you know that that person isn’t feeling you and you feel that disconnect from you on all levels---mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I’m not talking of a love from friend to friend for a fr

Good Men & Good Women...

What constitutes a good man? I can't begin to tell you how many times I have heard women say that "all the good ones are taken"...but what do they mean by that? Just today, I saw it online no less than ten times and in conversations with women as well....I mean what constitutes a good man? What are the mitagating deciding factors that make him good? Too often some people think that just because a man is married, makes him a good man...why, because he showed a committment to another woman? What makes a good woman? A phat ass? Bomb head? Money? Again, what are the factors that stipulate this is a "good woman"? Here's the thing, he may look like a good man to you, but you don't know what he may or may not be putting his significant other through...I say S.O. because I know more non married people that have been together for twenty odd years than married people. The Non Married or Living in Sin as the old folks say, seem to be more committment to a non comit

BullShyt Azz Men...

Fellas...ladies are tired of bullshyt ass men...you know...fellas we understand, and recognize that sometimes we (women) are not completely honest at times when it comes to what they want and are looking for in a relationship. We understand that sometimes we tell you we don't want a relationship when deep down some of us are craving to be in a relationship so they can share their "my man" stories. Some want to be in a relationship, to stem off loniliness and the feeling of being an old maid or spinster, while others just want a regular sex parnter...not viable reasons to me, but to each his own...however, lets talk about the MEN. Alot of men aren't honest either, and at times it seems the only thing they are honest about is phucking, when can they phuck, if they can phuck, and will they phuck. Is she fine, is she phat, how good does she look...thats honesty...An old wives tale says that the first thing that comes out of a mans mouth is the lie, everything after that

Sassy Entertainment Show Schedule for September & October

REAL TALK w/SASSYSCRIBE SHOW SCHEDULE: Thursday, September 6th @ 9pm - Bad Credit is the bane of society...Best selling author Harrine Freeman, of "HOW TO GET OUT OF DEBT". will discuss ways to eliminate debt...and put you on the path to financial freedom. Thursday, Septemer 13th @9pm - Women's Role in Relationships- Traditional vs. Modern Relationships - Modern women don't cook, traditional women do...traditional women knew their role and place, modern women continue to buck the system. Do you feel that the modern relationships of today are better or worse than the traditional relationships of the past? Thursday, September 20th @8pm (Special Time) - Womens Health - Suffer from Endometreosis or Fibroid Tumors...listen in to my special guest panelist Dr. John A Simon, M.D. of George Washington University as answers your questions and emails, as well as discuss causes and treatment ... Thursday, September 27th @9pm - Women Entrepeneurs...Special Guest Stephanie Popu

Playing Hard To Get...

How do you keep a person attracted once you have piqued their interest? As much as I talk about playing hard to get and ain't get got, sometimes playing hard to get can net the result of being got. Of course this only works if the person is truly interested in you...if they aren't then its an act of futility because sometimes if you don't know how to play the game right, then you end up pissing them off or pushing them away...and that is what we don't want... Playing hard to get at times can be a necessary evil, because as much as some of us hate to do it, and as much as some of us may not be very good at doing it, however, it can weed out the bad apples so to speak. If they only have a passing interest in you, then playing hard to get for them is going to prove to be too much work, and in the end they will stop the hard press pursuit. This can enligthen us in other ways as well, by increasing our awareness to our surroundings and also showing us what it is we like, and

Women & Accountability

"How can you give relationship advice, when you aren't in a relationship yourself?" This is the question asked of me by a female friend...she said that my blogs and talk show are great, she really enjoys reading and listening to them, but she doesn't understand how I can give out advice when I am not a current participant in a relationship at the moment. I stated that Dr. Spock never had children but that didn't stop him for penning a best selling novel that was the model for how the baby boomers raised their children. This person is a near and dear friend, so when she said it, it hurt my feelings and made me wonder if this is what everyone thinks. Then I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and told her that I do this to help women NOT to make the same mistakes I did. Having been in situations that were dumb, where I was STUPID, and naive, and just so damn gullible and blinded by those rose colored lenses I wore, that I hope that other women will read and listen and

How To Tell If He Is Cheating

I found this site and I think when a persons habits and behavior changes, for ME that is a sign that something is wrong and that the person's interest may lie elsewhere...these are some "trigger" phrases that makes me quiet, thoughtful, and watchful of all actions and words...but overall I watch the habits and behavior of the person, that tells on them quicker than anything 1. I got a run to make 2. I got business to take care of 3. Need time to sort things out 4. Going to be incommunicado for a while 5. Work is super busy But that's just me...this article list some other hints and also talks about cheating online- which myspace has been accused of wrecking plenty of relationships... ---------------------------------------------------------------- Written by Dating Guru http://dating-hints-tips.com/index.php/content/view/94/43/ “How do I tell if a guy is using me” is most probably the most common question I get asked on this site, the very first thing I think

BullShyt Azz Men...

Fellas...ladies are tired of bullshyt ass men...you know...fellas we understand, and recognize that sometimes we (women) are not completely honest at times when it comes to what they want and are looking for in a relationship. We understand that sometimes we tell you we don't want a relationship when deep down some of us are craving to be in a relationship so they can share their "my man" stories. Some want to be in a relationship, to stem off loniliness and the feeling of being an old maid or spinster, while others just want a regular sex parnter...not viable reasons to me, but to each his own...however, lets talk about the MEN. Alot of men aren't honest either, and at times it seems the only thing they are honest about is phucking, when can they phuck, if they can phuck, and will they phuck. Is she fine, is she phat, how good does she look...thats honesty...An old wives tale says that the first thing that comes out of a mans mouth is the lie, everything after that

Men Need Validation From Other Men...

Okay, yall know that I write my blogs to try to get women to understand that the things they do and say contradict their actions when it comes to men and then they get upset, call me a woman hater and say that I need to write about the stupid shyt men do...and sometimes by the things they say...men are always harping on the fact that women need validation from them and how they don't want any woman to feel the need to use them for validation, but what about men???? I know that some women validate themselves and measure their worth as a woman by whether or not they have a man. They see affection and attention and sex, as wanting, needing, and loving. But men need validation too...we see it everyday in the type of car that they drive, the job they choose/career path, and most especially the women they choose. Most men talk about their IBW and most always she has this super fantastic body and is a straight dime, oftentimes forgetting to look in the mirror and see that they aren't

Are Women Stupid....

Did anyone listen to the Steve Harvey show this morning? Is it me, or are there alot of lonely and desperate women in this world? WTF! Are women stupid...I mean what does it take for a woman to realize that that man does not want them. Some of the women that called in had some of the most outrageous situations that they were dealing with. To me they were basic jhedi mind tricks but these women were genuinely confused as to what it is they should do... One man had left his woman and then was making her prove to him that she isn't currently seeing another man. Now the bitch in me immediately reared its head, with WTF she doesn't have to prove a damn thing to him and if I were her, he wouldn't even be able to talk to me, afterall he left for "greener pastures"... Another woman's husband was telling her that she didn't turn him on sexually and that is why he goes to the strip clubs and watches an excessive amount of porn...and he has her feeling like she has t

Black Women & Marriage

Trolling the internet I found a comment made by a gentleman stating that black women were not raised to be wives. I had to stop and think about that, but as much as I hate to admit it, I think he has a point...I didn't say he was right, I said he has a point. Now, are men raised to be husbands? Do they understand and recognise what it takes to for a woman to "cleave unto him". Does she understand what if means? According to this gentlemen, black women were raised to believe that men are not about anything. That you should get all that you can financially from that man while you can...that women are taught to play men before he can play her. Falling back on old sayings, like nevet let your left hand know what your right hand is doing or make he pay girl. Is it because that some sisters were raised with the mentality that brothers ain't about anything and that brothers aren't to be trusted? I mean you hear all the time that a man will be whatever it is you tell him

Traditional vs Modern Relationships

Its been said that...modern women don't cook...traditional women do...traditional men are gentlemen...modern men are dogs...traditional women knew their role and place, modern women continue to get out of pocket. Traditional women are supportive, uplifting, respectful, loving, and kind. Modern women are argumentative, lazy, potty mouth, and only seem to be willing to perform random acts of kindness if it will get them somewhere. Traditional men are gentlemen, knows how to treat a woman like a queen, and is the ultimate caring, supportive, responsible provider. Modern men don't care don't give a phuck about treating you like a lady they on are on a stick and move tip. (before you bitch and moan, I generalized because that is how the thoughts came to me...not all men and women are like that)... (((smile))) I have talked to alot of people and this argument will probably go on until the end of time...but is there truth in any of the above statements? If you sit back and compare

Reason...Season...Lifetime

There is an old saying that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime and it is up to you to determine their purpose in your life. Folks will tell you that if its broke sometimes you have to wonder and evaluate if it is really worth fixing. Have you taken the time to analyze your friendships and relationships? Have you taken the time to figure out why that person is in your life? Are you still holding on to the hope that he or she will change...don't! When a person shows you who it is they are, believe them...they are not going to change their core personality for you...they may change or stop a bad habit, but it wasn't for you it was a quality of life issue that they felt they had to deal with. Take some time to yourself, do some soul searching...some of you are holding on to poisonous relationships and people in your life and you keep wondering why things are happening...and why there is so much drama...negative people are draining of your positive ener

Third Eye & Intuition...Do You Trust It?

Over the past weekend, I received alot of calls from friends going through various relationship issues and drama...but the underlying factor with all of them was trusting their third eye. You know that gut feeling you get when something is just not quite right...I N T U I T I O N. Do you trust your intuition? Has it ever led you astry? Down the wrong path? Have you ever felt that something just wasn't what they seemed, because you had this gut wrenching intuition that just wouldn't let go? It held you in its grips and although you felt something was wrong with every fiber of your being, you had to let it go because of lack of evidence or just plain insecurity and paranoia on your part? Some of the situations that I was made aware of, as a woman I guess I could see how the women would think that something was amiss...the brothers did admit to not answering all phone calls and "going dark" (incommunicado) which could make an insecure woman's intuition to over react.

Racism in America & The Jena6 Tragedy

I know that this travesty of justice has been going on for quite some time...and I have been remiss in not talking about this sooner. But it is hard for me to take in that in 2007 we still have to deal with miscarriages of justice due to racism. Its 2007 over 50 years since the beginning of the Cival Rights Movement and all that my forefathers fought and died for, we still have to defend ourselves based on our race. It is hard for me to put into words how I am feeling. My heart is hurting and as I write this my eyes are spilling over...this case should never have come to light and for those not familiar with Jena6 check out this www.jena6.blogspot.com and read more. Also don't let the fact that this is happening in another state deter you from voicing your opinion. The Jena6 blog lists various resources for one to write/call/email/fax their opionions to all parties involved...but don't stop there. I am also writing to my own governor as well as my local and state congressiona

Sassy's Show Schedule for September 2007

Real Talk with Sassyscribe Show Schedule: Thursday, September 6th @ 9pm - Bad Credit is the bane of society...Best selling author Harrine Freeman, of "HOW TO GET OUT OF DEBT". will discuss ways to eliminate debt...and put you on the path to financial freedom. Thursday, Septemer 13th @9pm - Womens Health - Suffer from Endometreosis or Fibroid Tumors...listen in to my special guest panelist discuss causes and treatment --Special Guest TBA Thursday, September 20th @9pm - Women's Role in Relationships- Traditional vs. Modern Relationships - Modern women don't cook, traditional women do...traditional women knew their role and place, modern women continue to buck the system. Do you feel that the modern relationships of today are better or worse than the traditional relationships of the past? Thursday, September 27th @9pm - Women Entrepeneurs...Special Guest Stephanie Popular will discuss how to set up a non profit organization and also discuss W.E.C.A.R.E. her own non p