This is an open letter to women that have children by men that already have or will continue to have multilple children with other women. This blog is for those women [white women] that have children with black men and when the situation doesn’t work out, they then want to remove themselves from that man’s life and his family. They begin to instill in their children the ails of being black and what it means to identify themselves as white. They teach the children to hate a part of themselves, their heritage and bithright. This is a letter about my nephew who has had multiple children by white women, but because the relationship between Mom & Dad did not work out, his family- my family is being made to suffer. My mother, my sisters and most important of all my nephews and nieces who are BROTHER & SISTER , are going to grow up not knowing the love of a sibling. They are going to grow up not knowing, having, feeling, and sharing that love and affection that is special between siblings. My niece unfortunately is not going to have to fend off her brothers from potential suitors. My nephews are not going to have that sisterly input when it come to dealing with women. My niece is not going to know how to relate to a man, a BLACK man because she is being raised by two white parents that are instilling in her a hatred and denial of her black heritage. I’m sorry, but they are not going to know how to deal with and/or handle the situation when it comes to these children being called a ‘nigger’…you don’t understand the power of that word as a black person does. You don’t and cannot understand how it cuts into your very core at being called that word…and that is something no one can properly grasp the true feelings of unless it has happened to you.
Years ago I made a personal decision to never have children…it was something that I was never interested in doing and didn’t think it made me any more or less of a woman because of it. I didn’t and at times still don’t understand these women that continue to have multiple children by multiple men. Is it an expression of love? Or is it a lack of caring about safety and just being sexually promiscious? Although I think they [children] are a blessing, some of y’all need not to have procreated because of the fucked up minds that you have and the fucked ways of thinking that you asribe to. Your logic is tragically flawed and it pisses me off that the children suffer for the fatuous and asinine rationality of the parents.
I am so totally pissed off! Its too bad that I can’t get to the childrens mother because she has chosen to move the children to Texas with her new white husband. She has chosen one of the most prejudice areas to move to Killean, TX to raise two black children, whom by the way look black because they have the nappiest hair of any mixed-race children, because my nephew has a bad grain of hair and that seed just took over. They have my nephews eyes, nose, lips, and hair…they have his mannerisms, they have his name, but most of all they have is blood coursing their their veins. This woman, my nephews babies momma wrote my sister a letter stating that her grandkids, his children no longer wish to be associated with her or the black side of their family. That it is their wish (mind you the children are 10 & 8) to never have a connection with their great-grandparents, their grandparents, great aunts, great uncle and a host of cousins, most especially with their father. That as far as they are concerned they want nothing to do with getting to know their brothers & sisters (my nephew has a total of 6 kids, she has two by him) for the rest of their natural lives. My sister was pole-axed when she received the letter! It hurt her to her heart but what is hurting her more is that she has to explain to her grandson that his brother and sister want nothing to do with him and he is 11 years of age.
Now, I am far from stupid and know that this letter and the words within did not come from a sound mind of an adult and I damn sure know that two children could not make a sound and/or profound decision such as that to eliminate and relegate their siblings and deny them for the rest of their lives. See the mother of the children has found this new man and a new happiness and I am so happy for her. Personally, I didn’t care for her at all, but I do care about the fact that she has chosen to write a letter and to move forward with the thought process and notion of denying the family access to the children. As happy as she is, and as much as she wishes to deny the true parentage of her children, she can never ever change the fact that she had two children by a black man and that those two children, according to the laws of society set forth by our ancestors and forefathers that those children are black.
I just want women [fathers too] and I know there are countless women out here that have children and their children have siblings, but for whatever reason, the mother is upset with the father; the father is an absentee parent; the parents just don’t vibe anymore; the father has moved on with another woman; regardless of the situation the children did not ask to be born. No matter the animosity that the parents may hold, why is it they can’t be man and woman enough to do that which is right for the children? Who said to women that its wrong for you to teach your children to befriend and embrace their other family members even though daddy and I are no longer together? Why is it that some women tend to teach their children to not like daddies new woman? I am not a parent, but from what my friends tell me its an unselfishness that a parent must have to force their needs to the back burner and place the needs of their children first. Unfortunately, some children have selfish parents…and because of their parent’s selfishness they are reared without knowing extended families, without knowing another part of themselves…
How many of you have gone to funerals and/or weddings and you are introduced to new family members? These newcomers “have the nerve” to show their face, when in fact these “newcomers” were most likely encouraged to not forge a relationship with the family because of the vacuousness of another…as much as it pains me to write this, I can see this very same situation happening in my family once these children come of age and just the thought of that in and of itselt is a tragedy that they shouldn’t have to endure but will be forced to endure because of one parents short-sightedness…
SassyScribe
Years ago I made a personal decision to never have children…it was something that I was never interested in doing and didn’t think it made me any more or less of a woman because of it. I didn’t and at times still don’t understand these women that continue to have multiple children by multiple men. Is it an expression of love? Or is it a lack of caring about safety and just being sexually promiscious? Although I think they [children] are a blessing, some of y’all need not to have procreated because of the fucked up minds that you have and the fucked ways of thinking that you asribe to. Your logic is tragically flawed and it pisses me off that the children suffer for the fatuous and asinine rationality of the parents.
I am so totally pissed off! Its too bad that I can’t get to the childrens mother because she has chosen to move the children to Texas with her new white husband. She has chosen one of the most prejudice areas to move to Killean, TX to raise two black children, whom by the way look black because they have the nappiest hair of any mixed-race children, because my nephew has a bad grain of hair and that seed just took over. They have my nephews eyes, nose, lips, and hair…they have his mannerisms, they have his name, but most of all they have is blood coursing their their veins. This woman, my nephews babies momma wrote my sister a letter stating that her grandkids, his children no longer wish to be associated with her or the black side of their family. That it is their wish (mind you the children are 10 & 8) to never have a connection with their great-grandparents, their grandparents, great aunts, great uncle and a host of cousins, most especially with their father. That as far as they are concerned they want nothing to do with getting to know their brothers & sisters (my nephew has a total of 6 kids, she has two by him) for the rest of their natural lives. My sister was pole-axed when she received the letter! It hurt her to her heart but what is hurting her more is that she has to explain to her grandson that his brother and sister want nothing to do with him and he is 11 years of age.
Now, I am far from stupid and know that this letter and the words within did not come from a sound mind of an adult and I damn sure know that two children could not make a sound and/or profound decision such as that to eliminate and relegate their siblings and deny them for the rest of their lives. See the mother of the children has found this new man and a new happiness and I am so happy for her. Personally, I didn’t care for her at all, but I do care about the fact that she has chosen to write a letter and to move forward with the thought process and notion of denying the family access to the children. As happy as she is, and as much as she wishes to deny the true parentage of her children, she can never ever change the fact that she had two children by a black man and that those two children, according to the laws of society set forth by our ancestors and forefathers that those children are black.
I just want women [fathers too] and I know there are countless women out here that have children and their children have siblings, but for whatever reason, the mother is upset with the father; the father is an absentee parent; the parents just don’t vibe anymore; the father has moved on with another woman; regardless of the situation the children did not ask to be born. No matter the animosity that the parents may hold, why is it they can’t be man and woman enough to do that which is right for the children? Who said to women that its wrong for you to teach your children to befriend and embrace their other family members even though daddy and I are no longer together? Why is it that some women tend to teach their children to not like daddies new woman? I am not a parent, but from what my friends tell me its an unselfishness that a parent must have to force their needs to the back burner and place the needs of their children first. Unfortunately, some children have selfish parents…and because of their parent’s selfishness they are reared without knowing extended families, without knowing another part of themselves…
How many of you have gone to funerals and/or weddings and you are introduced to new family members? These newcomers “have the nerve” to show their face, when in fact these “newcomers” were most likely encouraged to not forge a relationship with the family because of the vacuousness of another…as much as it pains me to write this, I can see this very same situation happening in my family once these children come of age and just the thought of that in and of itselt is a tragedy that they shouldn’t have to endure but will be forced to endure because of one parents short-sightedness…
SassyScribe
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