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Valentines Day & Men

It’s no secret that for the past six years my sister and my two cousins, and I throw a fabulously hot Valentine’s Day Party. Its live, off the hook, and interactive, with games, food, music, and prizes…there are sample drinks passed out each hour…a chocolate fountain with huge California vine ripened succulent strawberries…and a wide array of other desserts and delectable morsels.

There is a good time had by all, young and the young at heart. We do discriminate with ticket sales because we only want the Grown & Sexy in attendance…the exception we make is for the parents and aunts and uncles…hell, they taught us how to throw a party…how to get different groups to mix and mingle and stop sitting around all bougie and shyt.

But as I write this I am perplexed…Why is it that the word Valentine tends to scare and/or invoke a fear in people? Is it an admission or an acceptance of their own loneliness? I wonder?

You know I’ve been throwing this party for six years with no date and when I had a friend he never came…hell trying to get him to come to any event with me was too much of an admission of a “togetherness” he constantly stated he didn’t want…however, I digress…I have a shytload of single women coming to this party on Saturday and not one single man…because to get men, correction to get a single man to purchase a ticket is like trying to sell ice to an Eskimo. The first thing out of their mouths is “I don’t have a date”…duh, since when does a man need a date to go to a party…WTF its like the men are more afraid of coming to the party alone more than women… I asked a friend if he wanted to attend the party…not as my date, but just to come to a party and he said “you know I don’t do Valentine’s”…well correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t Valentine’s day on the 14th and not the 9th, which is the day if the party…I asked another friend if he wanted to go, but he said he wants to but he doesn’t want to have to bring his girlfriend…what kinda bullshyt is that…see there ladies…that’s another part of the okeydoke…the women asked “will there be single men?” ---initially I said yes, but now since all of them have punked out…I have to ask…is it because the man is facing his own fear of loneliness and not being in a relationship? Does he think that a woman is going to be hard pressed to get him in a relationship, should he meet one at the party? What???

Its perplexing as to why this day invoke negative connotations for men?

Can the men help me to understand why Valentine’s is anathema (nee detested) by you all?



ikj said…
first for those in a relationship happy valentines. for those not i a relationship happy valentines day. secondly at full disclosure my birthday is valentines day. for a man it was hard growing up with that. that being said i grew into it. being with or not with someone shouldn't stop you from loving yourself first and foremost. when you do that you can truly love another. when you are confident in who you are your life isn't shaped by if you have a significant or not.
lest i digress. it is great that you throw an annual valentines party and invite people. all you can do is make the offer; if they don't want to come in a relaxed atmosphere for grown a sexy people shame on them. i have a friend i just started talking to and if i saw your post earlier i would have come with her. it just takes some planning since i live in western new york. now to the question at hand why is it that men are reluctant to come to a valentines party for/with grown and sexy people. Maybe in their mind if they come with their significant who is an 80 but when they get to the party run into someone who could be the 20 that they are missing then they may jump at the chance. in the end you realize that you could have had a v-8 instead. lol!!! some men don't realize that you can have a life and be friends with women. you never know the friends you meet at the party may introduce you to someone who is right for you. go with no expectations just to have fun. Just because yo meet someone at a party doesn't mean they are pressing you to commit to them and start moving in. love has been defined by some in past relationships,others, media and they haven't reclaimed what it means to them. Now the brother who didn't want to bring his significant to the party; then if he listened to himself then he should go and work on that relationship before going into something else. if nothing else close that door before opening another. that was learning process for me; so i can admit my mistakes and move on by correcting them. As my man stringer bell said in the wire sometimes you need a second pair of eyes to look at things.
keep up the great work and i won't be stranger.
well continue to do great work and expand the discourse
SassyScribe said…
Thanks for your comments...those that didn't come missed one helluva party...and a boatload of sexy, sultry, single ladies...oh well, their loss!


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