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Who Has The Power....

I was talking on another board and one of the women asked this question...

Is the state of the black church one of the reasons why many black women remain single? Do men control the state of marriage or does pussy power still prevail?

Now my response addressed alot of the other comments, but the basic premise is again about women...and this is what SassyScribe had to say....

The problem is that women aren't being honest...and they aren't listening to what men are telling them. If you meet a man and he tells you that he is not getting married and not looking for a relationship, why then do you continue to stay with him?

There is no tried and true method to getting a man to the altar...what women need to do is stop trying to define themselves by the fact that they have a man in their life. Stop buying into the fact that good men are in church...there are alot of men in church, the majority are married, or gay and the singles ones are in there looking for some desperate ass. The same women singing in the Choir on Sunday were in the club Saturday "backing that ass up" and rubbing you down in a vain attempt to get u to want them.

Its sad and pathetic...I know, because I hear from women daily on this topic wanting to know what is wrong with them. Why can't a man love them or why is it that men don't seem to stay with them after the sex? Men don't stay after the sex because that is all he wanted. There is nothing wrong with them, they just need to open their minds to men of all races. Its sad, but the bottomline is that women don't have a clear definition of what it is they want in a man. They constantly compromise their values and principles and morals thinking that this man is going to want them or like them more. Women are walking out of the house damn near naked thinking a man is going to want them. Women need to stop thinking that every man they meet are "the one"...and we talk about out of wedlock parents. I can honestly say, that I am over 35 and I have yet to have ever met a man that I would want to have children with. That is why I never understood the "oops I got pregnant" factor from women. I have been having sex for along time and I have never had a condom break or my birth control not work, which was super vitally important to me, because I never wanted children and part of that stemmed from the fact that I never see relationships work once the child comes into the picture.

But I digress, there are major problems that black women don't want to The Myth of Honesty in Relationships (, read The Myth of Honesty with Self ( know when all a woman has to offer a man is her body then she is in trouble...but then again, men say they want intelligent, sexy and independent women, but the reality is a brother doesn't want a clinging vine and yet you can't be too strong or too independent.

So how do you must first know yourself....what are your likes and dislikes, wants, desires, ambition and goals. Once a woman (or a man) truly knows themselves then these topics will be obsolete...but this is a testament this board and others like it that women are still floundering trying to find themselves and where they stand with men.

This Friday I am addressing a similar topic as to why brothers prefer white women and one brother stated that its because black women are unsupportive, argumentative, lazy, dramatic, self serving, manipulative, and those are just 6 of the 10 words he rolled off his tongue as to what he deems the "average sistergurl in the city attitude"...Check it out 9pm...



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