Skip to main content

Fair-Weather Friends

Fair-weather friends, only want to be around you in the good times. Fair-weather friends always think you have a motive for being their friend. Fair-weather friends, need justification from others on their looks, and status in life...fair-weather friends are not friends at all, rather they are minions of society whom only are concerned about themselves. They hurt others in the process and that is just a casualty of the system...because in the end, a fair-weather friend is only out to get what they can out of the friendship. In the end you realize that whom you thought was a friend, was just an aquaintance that should've never made it into your inner circle. They should have always been on the outer fringes of your life.

My definition of a friend is someone that is with you through the good and bad times. A person that can tell you honestly that you phucked up and still laugh with you, at you, and at your mistakes, triumphs, sorrows, and joys. A friend that will hold you up when you need them to, and hold you back from harmful or distructive behaviors. A friend doesn't let the words of another person place doubt in your mind on anything, because if that person is your friend, then you would know their character inside and out and that a real friend wouldn't say anything behind your back that they can't say to your face. A real friend should be able to praise and criticize without fear of retribution.

I have to talk about a situation that has been weighing on my mind and heart for the past few months. For the last thirty years I had a best friend (at least that's what I thought we were), I believed to be a true friend. This friendship started in middle school and I was too young to see it then...but from the beginning of our friendship, I have had to always justify myself to this person, especially when it came down to a man telling lies about me. I put it down to the insecurities that we, as women tend to have when we are girls...you know, wanting to be pretty enough and fit in. It had gotten to a point where we stopped speaking for five years right after high school and I was the one to break the ice and hand her a dove. That rift in our friendship was over twenty years ago, but sadly, some mannerisms and thought processess never change.

Now we fast-forward to 2007 and another man has caused this friendship to be lost- forever. I didn't want it to end, I even sent her a Christmas card and I called her two times prior to that, all with no contact...Yes, it has endured its share of ups and downs over the last thirty odd years, but I never thought at the age of 40 (I turn 40 on June 7th) that I would have to continue to justify myself because of something a man has said. This childish game of he-said/she-said, culminated a few months ago, when she kept telling me that she wished to speak to me and not over the phone. Initially, I didn't think about it, but when she repeated it several more times, I took offense because it sounded like she didn't trust my words over the phone and that she had to gauge my action/reaction in person. She had to see me, to believe me...and she said to me at that time, "that if it means that we won't be friends anymore then so be it"...I said what I had to say to her, and I hung up the phone offended and hurt, because I thought our friendship meant more to her than that.

YES, YES, YES, this situation is alot deeper AND goes back to our twenties....this situation has more twists, and turns and would make for a great novel, but it would hurt alot of innocent people in the process...so rather than put the parties involved out there...(because lets face it, they know who they are)...I just wanted to release some heartache to let everyone know...that Sassy is human too...

Take this time and opportunity to tell your friends that you love them and if there is doubt in your mind about any of your friends, you need to re-evaluate your relationship.

SassyScribe

Comments

Anonymous said…
Wow Sassy,
Looks like you handled this a lot better than I probably would have. This is the main reason why I keep such a small circle of friends. My associates are many, but my circle is made up of a chosen few. This is not because I think that I am all that or anything along those lines. It's just that (ALL) of us have issues some great and some small. There is only so many hours in the day to deal with my own crap let alone somebody elses. LOL Consider this "friendship-breakup" a blessing. Spend your precious time and energy on some new friends.

Peace & Love,
brutbrut
SassyScribe said…
Happy New Year to you...glad to have you back.

Yes, I weathered this storm, but it still hurts...

SassyScribe

Popular posts from this blog

So Horny...It Hurts!

As usual my discussions stem from random thoughts that I have and from conversations with friends, family, & acquaintances. But we were talking about sex and levels of horniness and one of us spoke up and said, "I'm so horny...it hurts!" (Hmmm...I thought about this and came here...to you...)

Have you ever gotten to the point where you are so horny it hurts! Its a physical ache deep in your bones. Every muscle and sinew, every step, stretch, and run, is so physically excrutiating to the point of being unbearable! You know sometimes your eyes cross, you get bumps on your face, and your nerves are completely on edge. You say your are angry and frustrated when in fact all you need is a little hot monkey sex to get you back in order...In situations like that, your body has a tendency to shut down on itself.

As I write this, I wonder how many of us are so horny that it hurts? I honestly feel that dyck and puzzy are a dime a dozen...anyone, and I do mean anyone, regardless o…

Summer Time is OVA & WSER Sassy Entertainment Radio™ Is Back!!!

Summertime is over and Sassy & Dlyte are back for more love and sexuality talk on WSER Sassy Entertainment Radio™!!!

September 2nd Sassy and Dlyte dishes the 411 on their favorite and the sexiest most musicological artist of all time PRINCE ROGERS NELSON with Barbara Rogers Rashid founder of the FloridaNPG Fan club as she shares her recent visit with the Purple One at Paisley Park Studios.

September 9th - Tim Alexander Castles Studios Filmaker and director of DIARY OF A TIRED BLACK MAN joins in the discussion on the state of black men and women and relationships.

September 16th - When To Give Into Intimacy is it the 3rd date, 3 months, or 6 months...??? Sassy & Dlyte will discuss if and/or when is there a right time to move forward with an intimate relationship.



September 23rd - Filmmaker & Director Dennis Dortch visits WSER to discuss his latest movie GOOD DAY TO BE BLACK & SEXY a movie about Black love and sexuality as well as the current state of black relationships.

Women Are Emotionally Retarded

The topic on women not listening sparked a madddd debate between a friend and I.

I am of the belief that if a woman is interested in a man and that man she is interested in or in lust with doesn't reciprocate her feelings she should move on. She should remove herself from this man and also ensure that he is no longer in her immediate inner circle/core of friends, but rather on the outer fringes of her life. I was told that by my saying this, then I believe that women are emotionally unable to handle rejection and therefore must cast their net out to others hoping that someone else will bite. Rather we (women) should keep this man around as a friend and not involve ourselves with other men, just because the man that the woman is interested in is not interested in her. He went on to liken it to a woman shooting buckshots until she shoots and catches someone.

I went on to state that if women find themselves in this emotional quagmire of a situation with a man whose feelings aren't …