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Whose To Blame???

Whose to blame for the generational issues facing our community, especially those of our youth?

I ask because of a conversation I had in the barbershop a while back...basically one of the gentlemen said that the reason our young boys are straying and doing what they do is due in large part to the fact that HIS generation is at fault. The generation that he refers to is the children of the baby boomers. He said that the men left, didn't uphold and/or share in the rearing, raising, and responsibility of the children and it has had an adverse affect on the kids.
His claim stemmed from the pressure that kids are faced with daily and also the luxuries that we have given them. Are the children spoiled? Are they rambunctious? Mischevious? or just plain Unruly?

Young women don't seem to respect themselves the way they should. The music videos portray that they have to act a certain way in order to get men. The fashion industry shows them that they have to be rail thin in order to be attractive. Young boys emulate the rap artist, NBA, & NFL players, with their bling bling and hoochies. Gansta rap has appeared to make them fearless, willing to die for a street corner or some other ill-fated belief instilled in him by another street corner hustler or supposedly caring brother. The lack of a father or even a credible, responsible father figure in their lives has forced many a boy to teach themselves how to be a man. Women can raise a boy, but they cannot teach them how to be a man. Men can raise girls, but they cannot teach them how to be a woman. (don't shoot, yes I generalized and this is not true in all cases)

The rate of single female households continues to rise, but as I thought about what he said, I think its all of the above...parents are rewarding children for bad behavior. When we were growing up the neighbors, aunts, uncles, and other extended family members and friends could scold you, spank you, then send you home to be scolded, spanked, and punished all over again. But US (yes my generation) let someone say something to your child that you don't like, your ready to fight the adult instead of listening with an open mind about your child. No I don't have kids, but I am a firm believer that parents truly know their kids, and they know what that child will and won't do...parents are working longer hours to give the kids that which they lacked growing up...the norm seems to be grandparents stepping in where the parents aren't or can't.

We can try and blame televison, movies, music, and other media, but in the end the blames lies with us. A Generation of men and women dropped the ball on raising their children for that job, or man, drugs, and alcohol. WE didn't do our part in ensuring a viable environment for our kids. Our culture used to be based on the village raising the child, where the word of an adult meant something, it was heard, listened to, and respected.

We can't lay the blame on others all of the time, sometimes we have to look out ourselves, and ask "Whose to blame?"



Interesting point. There are few mainstream role-models out there getting air time. The media only wants to show a brother in a negative or controversial habitat.
SassyScribe said…
True, but its not up to the media...its up to the parent to raise them, and to instill in them right from wrong so that the child will make the right decision and not the wrong one.

Thanks for joining in the discussions, I look forward to hearing from you again.

Anonymous said…
You said alot. I dont know the age of that guy that you were conversing with but he is right and you are right.
I am 30 years old. I am part of generation X. We were the reason for the 1 million man march. They said we were bad as shit and it was because our fathers were not around. They got fucked up by Vietnam, and drugs and sex. But whatever the excuse was, they weren't there.
So then we had 1000000+ men together for a cause; AWARENES OF AND FOR THE BLACK MALE. Then they left D.C. that day with all kinds of agendas and 13 years later, aint shit changed...yes it did, it got worse.
Too many of our Black men have finally gotten their just dues but forgot where the fuck from which they came. You see them in their nice cars, suits on Sunday and their good jobs, and they moved out to the "Burbs" to get away from the hood. Then they never looked back. Give their money to church, NAACP, or other non-profits that don't do shit but complain. They are constantly talking about taking back the neighborhoods but all they do is talk. They make enough money in fundraisers and dues that they could buy the hood and fix all that shit up.
Anyway, I am going on a tangent. We allow radio and TV to raise our kids and we put a monetary value on success. So all our kids know is money, but we DON'T teach them how to get it; So they learn from drug dealers. And since we aint teaching them, noone is telling them that that isnt the right way or the only way.
So now we are scared of the monsters that we created. It's so bad the those people who moved to the burbs have bad ass kids and since they weren't prepared to handle it, their kids are running them.
So what do we do now????
Anonymous said…
Wow Sassy,
This is an awesome subject to kick around. I think you hit all the points correctly. I take pride in raising all of my Children as a young black man. I long for the way things were back in the day when I was growing up! I guess I was a bit naive in thinking that things would always be that way where we all looked out for each other as an entire community. Like you said, we have NOBODY to blame on this important list of issues but our ownselves.

Peace & Love,

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