Skip to main content

Should We Question...

Should we question future lovers in reference to their past and/or present sexual history?

Michael Baisden asked this question on his radio show {10-11-05}. He stated that over the weekend he had asked a woman how many current or past lovers she had and she became irate, telling him that that question was inappropriate for a first date. He said that it wasn't. Personally, I feel that it was.

Why would I divulge such information on a first date? I/we may find out that we don't really like on another. We both know immediately upon sight how far the relationship will/will not go. Myself, I know within minutes of meeting a man whether or not I would sleep with him. I can tell that from phone conversations. Some voices turn me on, others turn me to a friend...

This topic prompted an indepth discussion amongst my friends. As women, all in our late thirties, we sat down and began to make a list {yes a list} of the lovers that we had...having become sexually active in our teens, the list was---enlightening.

All of us agreed that the question was inappropiate for a first date, however, if there is a natural progression towards oneness, then that question is not inappropiate. In fact, it is vital to know past sexual histories to make sure you're compatible. Sex is important to ALL relationships, because sexual imcompatibility leads to unhappiness and unfulfillment. Which in turn, leads to cheating...but thats another topic.

If we are honest, men cannot handle the fact that a woman that they may potentially date has had multiple lovers. The adage is if a woman gives you a number, you automatically double it! The old double standard comes into play, because it is expected that men will have several lovers over the course of his life. Yet, when a woman has the same, if not more experience, her potential for "wife" with is lessened.

Honestly men, if you met a woman and the vibe between the two of you was great, and you asked her that question and her answer was 20 and she was 40, and if you had the adage of doubling that number...your view of her may become skewed. One would think her promiscuous, loose, easy, etc...when in fact, she was a liberated female who enjoyed herself and indulged in some of lifes pleasures.

As a woman, I think that people should ask questions of a potential mate. But as an adult, we must understand, that if this person is only on the outer fringes of your life, then they have ABSOLUTELY NO RIGHT, to ask any questions.

I'm interested to know what the men think on this topic. Looking forward to reading your comments...



Popular posts from this blog

So Horny...It Hurts!

As usual my discussions stem from random thoughts that I have and from conversations with friends, family, & acquaintances. But we were talking about sex and levels of horniness and one of us spoke up and said, "I'm so hurts!" (Hmmm...I thought about this and came you...)

Have you ever gotten to the point where you are so horny it hurts! Its a physical ache deep in your bones. Every muscle and sinew, every step, stretch, and run, is so physically excrutiating to the point of being unbearable! You know sometimes your eyes cross, you get bumps on your face, and your nerves are completely on edge. You say your are angry and frustrated when in fact all you need is a little hot monkey sex to get you back in order...In situations like that, your body has a tendency to shut down on itself.

As I write this, I wonder how many of us are so horny that it hurts? I honestly feel that dyck and puzzy are a dime a dozen...anyone, and I do mean anyone, regardless o…

Are Women Whores for Money?

I have been thinking about this topic for a minute and I plan to discuss it at length soon, but for right now, I just have one question, or rather an observation.

Is it me or are women whores for money? Are women whores for a certain lifestyle to the point that they sell their souls to live the good life? They don't care if their man is phucking half of the nation so long as he brings the bacon home to them. They don't care if he looks like the broad side of a bus or the bottom of a shoe, so long as his dollars are long and his pockets are deep. I've heard women say, {self included} that so long as he was making money that he could do any damn thing he wanted...but that is a hypothetical situation. In real life, having dated men with money, I realized one thing - they are the most arrogant assholes around! So I had to say to myself what was more important, that man, that man and his money, that man his money and his lifestyle I was enthralled by, or my self respect. Guess w…

Women Are Emotionally Retarded

The topic on women not listening sparked a madddd debate between a friend and I.

I am of the belief that if a woman is interested in a man and that man she is interested in or in lust with doesn't reciprocate her feelings she should move on. She should remove herself from this man and also ensure that he is no longer in her immediate inner circle/core of friends, but rather on the outer fringes of her life. I was told that by my saying this, then I believe that women are emotionally unable to handle rejection and therefore must cast their net out to others hoping that someone else will bite. Rather we (women) should keep this man around as a friend and not involve ourselves with other men, just because the man that the woman is interested in is not interested in her. He went on to liken it to a woman shooting buckshots until she shoots and catches someone.

I went on to state that if women find themselves in this emotional quagmire of a situation with a man whose feelings aren't …