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I was having a conversation with a male friend of mine today and he asked me to go to his myspace blog and comment. Well I did that and to sum up his blog he discussed how women lie all the time...they lie about cheating, they lie about paternity in general they just lie...and here is how our IM convo went...

TiredBlackMan: I just read your comment
SassyScribe: and
TiredBlackMan: and I must say...
TiredBlackMan: what the hell are trying to say?
SassyScribe: LOL
SassyScribe: what
TiredBlackMan: yeesh
TiredBlackMan: you made it personal
SassyScribe: so
TiredBlackMan: women lie in general
SassyScribe: don't generalize bama
SassyScribe: everyone lies in general
SassyScribe: men lie all the time
SassyScribe: its one of the reasons I stopped dating
TiredBlackMan: and that old excuse that men do it isn't a valid excuse
SassyScribe: all that do unto others is BS when men aren't honest from jump
SassyScribe: its not an excuse its the truth
TiredBlackMan: so two wrongs make it right?
SassyScribe: for some yes
SassyScribe: tit for tat is pat
SassyScribe: it will never go out
TiredBlackMan: that's what's wrong
TiredBlackMan: with America
SassyScribe: no whats wrong is that folks lie before they tell the truth
TiredBlackMan: shady ass b.s. secrets and lies
SassyScribe: for instance...I assume that a man has a FWB from jump until or unless I see otherwise for myself
SassyScribe: and the same goes for men unless or until they see otherwise...
TiredBlackMan: my cousin right now is possibly raising another man's child
TiredBlackMan: because his trick ass wife (what is up Baltimore women? that's another blog entirely) went out and did the wild thing and now he's afraid to find out whether the child is his or not
TiredBlackMan: she says its his
TiredBlackMan: but she's a trick
SassyScribe: see I have tried the honesty thing by telling men that I am totally single and they still think I am lying...and that is because they are lying to me
SassyScribe: you cousin can get a blood test whats the issue
TiredBlackMan: he's a dumbass
SassyScribe: yeah she was a trick because why cheat raw
TiredBlackMan: that's his issue
SassyScribe: hell y cheat period
SassyScribe: well he needs to man up and find out now...
SassyScribe: so he couldn't raise another man's child...because as unfortunate as the situation is...its not the childs fault
SassyScribe: too often we punish the child for the fault of the parents
TiredBlackMan: yeah because after 24-36 months he will be responsible for support of the child regardless of the results of paternity
SassyScribe: he needs to take a stand now
TiredBlackMan: anyway women lie
TiredBlackMan: lie lie lie
TiredBlackMan: all the time
TiredBlackMan: oooh baby
TiredBlackMan: you're making me cum
TiredBlackMan: that's real nice
TiredBlackMan: I've nevver did this before...
TiredBlackMan: this is my first itme
TiredBlackMan: I wouldn't do that to you honey...
TiredBlackMan: ALL LIES
SassyScribe: well then that man knowing that those are lies women say need to understand that and take the necessary steps from there
TiredBlackMan: LIES I TELL YA
TiredBlackMan: women's lies started in the Garden of Eden
SassyScribe: whatever...its also the type of woman ur attracting and what is it that ur putting out there to get these liars
TiredBlackMan: so your theory that MAN is responsible for starting the lie trend has hsitorical holes in it
TiredBlackMan: I never put anything past any woman
SassyScribe: then I feel sorry for u
SassyScribe: ergo that is the problem between the sexes today
SassyScribe: I take u at face value until or unless u show me otherwise
TiredBlackMan: experience has taught me that there is no goody two shoes left
TiredBlackMan: only stiletto freak um dressed freaks
SassyScribe: damn
TiredBlackMan: in disguise
SassyScribe: with that attitude u won't meet the right woman
TiredBlackMan: churchonSunday,freakonMonday
TiredBlackMan: whatever
TiredBlackMan: I'm going to start datingoutsidetherace
SassyScribe: go ahead
SassyScribe: hopefully u will be happier
TiredBlackMan: that's what I hope
SassyScribe: but I hate to hear that just because you haven't met the right black woman that you feel a white one is going to do the trick...
TiredBlackMan: my friend who entered a comment before you on the topic has sworn of black women
TiredBlackMan: and so have my two of my cousins
TiredBlackMan: and they are much happier young men because of it
TiredBlackMan: I love black women
TiredBlackMan: I believe we have synergy that is incomparable
SassyScribe: you don't sound like it
TiredBlackMan: but I'm soo so tired now
TiredBlackMan: at the risk of sounding soul is tired of the abuse and frustration I get dealing with the sisters
SassyScribe: I am so sorry to hear u say that...but I'm not surprised...just remember that the grass isn't always greener and are the women that your relatives have now...they are more "malleable" aren't they...they take direction well
TiredBlackMan: yes
SassyScribe: figures
SassyScribe: if u want a door mat, go buy one from Target
TiredBlackMan: you can't tell a black woman nothing like Kanye West
SassyScribe: that is a punk ass bama ass move right there
TiredBlackMan: what's wrong with being submissive?
SassyScribe: nothing if its properly submissive as opposed to doing as your told
TiredBlackMan: the bible calls for a good wife to be submisive
TiredBlackMan: our minister preached that word a few sundays ago..I wish you had heard it
TiredBlackMan: he called for women to put down their arrogance and fall in line with God's word
TiredBlackMan: it's hard for black women to take a step back and let a man lead
TiredBlackMan: because they have been saddled with the all the responsiblity for so long
TiredBlackMan: so rightfully when they meet a "good man" they get into an ego battle and try to challenge every step of the way
TiredBlackMan: then they wonder why that man won't stay
SassyScribe: not all women are like that
TiredBlackMan: you just get tired of fighting a losing battle, ya know?
SassyScribe: I have a strong personality and my last boyfriend was the leader...but in order for some women to be lead they have to have faith, trust, and belief that the "leader" will guide them in the right direction
TiredBlackMan: it wears on you
SassyScribe: yeah I know...thats why I stopped having casual sex and dating...
SassyScribe: I was tired of the BS and had to pull back and date me
SassyScribe: you should try it...
TiredBlackMan: bama I haven't dated seriously in over two years
SassyScribe: now I have met a couple of duds, but right now I have 3 good men in my life and I am going to let nature take its if works out if not then oh well
TiredBlackMan: I'm tired of dating "me"
TiredBlackMan: I need a woman that understands that everything isn't always about her
TiredBlackMan: and just play nice
TiredBlackMan: stop trying pull against me let's compliment each other
TiredBlackMan: it's not that hard
SassyScribe: yeah but sometimes it is about her because women feel like u too but when we feel like this we are labeled argumentative and uncompromising and not submissive...all because the man has to realize that its not always about him either
SassyScribe: you know everytime I put a man first he has treated me like shit
SassyScribe: but when I put myself first I am treated like a queen...what the fuck is wrong with that scenario
TiredBlackMan: but dammit from the church to the streets to the great wall of china every black woman I meet has those issues
SassyScribe: I know women that can't do enough for a man and still he is
SassyScribe: Undecided as to what he wants from her
SassyScribe: and you don't
SassyScribe: you are issue free right
TiredBlackMan: YES !
SassyScribe: whatever...we all have issues...I know my biggest hurdles are impatience and anger
TiredBlackMan: and the fact that you're a hot ass bama but go on...
SassyScribe: LOL
SassyScribe: oh yeah...since I have been dating again its like men can smell me or something
TiredBlackMan: take a bath
SassyScribe: everywhere I seem to be attracted to what they see...
SassyScribe: forget u
TiredBlackMan: LMAO
SassyScribe: and I am not the smallest woman or the prettiest woman, but I smile and carry myself in a happy manner and men like happy women as opposed to sour and dour women
TiredBlackMan: thats true
TiredBlackMan: you smile the whole world smiles with cry you cry alone
SassyScribe: whatever
SassyScribe: you sound so negative
SassyScribe: hurt
SassyScribe: dejected
SassyScribe: unwanted and unloved
TiredBlackMan: some people whole posture and attitude just reads "unapproachable"
TiredBlackMan: I'm all that
TiredBlackMan: I'm not wanted
TiredBlackMan: I'm not a thug, pretty boy, muscle bound stripper eye candy man
SassyScribe: so what
TiredBlackMan: I'm big pimping with my wheels spinning and balling and shot calling
TiredBlackMan: I'm not
SassyScribe: if the women u meet are wanting those type of men...then u are meeting the wrong women
TiredBlackMan: I don't talk "game"
TiredBlackMan: I'm just a skinny kid from Hampton trying to be the best man I can be
TiredBlackMan: but that's never enough for the ladies of the 21st century
SassyScribe: and if that is the case a woman will see that...but are you showing that to them or are you trying to show women someone u are not
TiredBlackMan: it wouldn't be so bad if black women in a burst of honesty looked me in the eye and told me I wasn't their type
TiredBlackMan: you don't know how much that hurts
SassyScribe: I tell me all the time I am not their type
SassyScribe: but they say things like "ur cute for a dark skinned sista"
TiredBlackMan: to be told over and over that you're not the "type" of guy that I'm looking ofr
TiredBlackMan: for
SassyScribe: or "normally I am not attracted to plus size dark women, but in ur case I'll make the exception"
TiredBlackMan: well
TiredBlackMan: who's type am I?
SassyScribe: I don't know
TiredBlackMan: I give up
SassyScribe: don't give up though...
SassyScribe: there is a woman out there for you...God has deemed it so and you just have to wait on him to tell u the time is right
SassyScribe: you are going to make me right a blog on this...
SassyScribe: "I am Through With Sistas"
SassyScribe: and copy and paste this entire convo into the blog
TiredBlackMan: :S
SassyScribe: what
TiredBlackMan: dont use my name if you do
SassyScribe: I would erase ur ID and call you AngryBlackMan
TiredBlackMan: how about TIREDBLACKMAN? I'm not angry
TiredBlackMan: I'm wore out emotionally, spiritually, and even physically trying to meet the needs of unappreciative black women
TiredBlackMan: all a man wants is to feel appreciated
SassyScribe: okay
TiredBlackMan: good black are taken for granted
SassyScribe: so are good black women
TiredBlackMan: thugs are shown love
SassyScribe: unfortunately they are
TiredBlackMan: sistas will bail a raggedy nigga out of jail
SassyScribe: so in your opinion what can a sista do to change your mind about dating outside of your race?
SassyScribe: not all sistas...come on now...dopm
SassyScribe: stop generalizing...
TiredBlackMan: but let me be in financial bind and I need something I'll get told to go to hell and my manhood will be challenged
SassyScribe: again not all sistas
SassyScribe: hell I took care of a man for over 10 years...
SassyScribe: most likely I won't do it again, but its in my nature to give more than I get...
SassyScribe: I absolutely do not ask men for money...I just don't, but I know alot of women that do
SassyScribe: they feel that their bodies are like an ATM machine...dick go comes sad but true
SassyScribe: but again, not all women are like that...
SassyScribe: generally we all want to be loved, wanted, desired, and needed
SassyScribe: and telling folks to look at themselves in the mirror is an admission that something is wrong with me
SassyScribe: are you giving off a vibe to women that you meet? Like are you projecting the end before the beginning even starts?
TiredBlackMan: I don't think so. Keep in mind I've been dating "me" for over 2 years
SassyScribe: and in that two years what have you found?
TiredBlackMan: I'm just tired of fighting the uphill batle
TiredBlackMan: I see other people happy and I want that happiness too
SassyScribe: then ur are meeting the wrong type of women...tell me...what is the overall physical appearance of the women u meet?
SassyScribe: I want to be happy too...but you have to be happy with self before you can be happy with some else...come on...
SassyScribe: lets keep it real and be honest...your talking to Sassy okay...are you totally happy with you?
TiredBlackMan: I have no preference. I've dated tall women, short women, light skin, dark skin, stout, etc.
TiredBlackMan: makes no difference
SassyScribe: remember...the common denominator is what are YOU doing to block ur happiness
TiredBlackMan: it comes to a point either they lose interest becaue I'm not their "type" or I lose patience with their bullshit
TiredBlackMan: the only stable relationship that is positive is with this lady that is 6 years older than me. She gets it
TiredBlackMan: her maturity level and sense of humor and caring attiude
TiredBlackMan: but...
SassyScribe: whats the issue
TiredBlackMan: because of the age difference and she is no longer of child bearing age she feels like she's cheating me of the experience of developing a full blown relationship with marriage and kids
TiredBlackMan: so we remain friends
TiredBlackMan: she's one of my best friends actually
TiredBlackMan: all the girls my age and younger are still trying to find their way
TiredBlackMan: and their way is to run right over good old me
TiredBlackMan: damn them
SassyScribe: at least she is honest enough to tell u that...
TiredBlackMan: I repspect her
SassyScribe: she could lie to you and say of course I want and can have more kids, but she is realistic to know that the probability of her conceiving is slim
TiredBlackMan: we're cool peeps
TiredBlackMan: I understand
SassyScribe: good...but don't give up on sistas...I am going to tell u the same thing I tell women about black men whenthey start talking this bunk about no good brothers and they all lie...
SassyScribe: there are alot of good black women out here, unfortunately you haven't met the right one for you, but trust me it will happen
SassyScribe: too often we go in search for love rather than letting love find us...and love happens when ur not looking for it...
TiredBlackMan: do I need to wear a sign of something?
SassyScribe: I'm not saying be a recluse, but get out, do more....go to different events...
SassyScribe: like tonight I am attending a gala event it was unexpected but you never know...I will at the very least expand my network base
TiredBlackMan: I have been reclusive lately because I'm not feeling the social scene anymore
SassyScribe: no you don't need to wear a sign, but project happiness and a zest for life and trust me women can see that
SassyScribe: walk with a swagger and/or confidence and women will see that
TiredBlackMan: hmm
SassyScribe: walk with a purpose and women will see that
TiredBlackMan: get a tattoo and say b*tch come here
TiredBlackMan: they seem to respond tothug talk
TiredBlackMan: slick talk like the old heads would say
TiredBlackMan: I think I'll talk to some old pimps and players and have them school me
TiredBlackMan: because everyone hates the nice guy
TiredBlackMan: that's a universal truth
SassyScribe: not everyone...I have a friend that you might like...but then again I am not sure...want me to hook yall up?
TiredBlackMan: is she a bama?
SassyScribe: maybe thats ur issue...your meeting too many bamas...are you a bama yourself?
TiredBlackMan: no I'm a (ninja)
SassyScribe: now that is a bama statement...I know u but some women may say WTF is wrong with this guy

What upsets me the most about this conversation is that he truly believes that the grass may be greener on the other side if he dates outside of his race. It is upsetting because he feels that black women cannot be submissive or understanding and he has generalized that we are all wanting thugs and are controlling. Not all women are into "bad boys", although society may state otherwise, but most women just want a genuinely nice man, that is kind, considerate, passionate, responsible, and sexy...women have no problem letting men lead, however, from past experience they have unfortunately submitted and believed in the wrong man, who ultimately led them astray. So when they do meet the right man, they don't trust and/or understand that the ills from the last relationships should not be thrust upon the shoulders of the new its a vicisous cycle that we need to men and women.

As his blog stated, women lie...but in general, people lie. It goes back to my blogs that I wrote a few months back...the Myth of Honesty in Relationships and the Myth of Honesty with Self. How can a person be honest with another individual if they are not open and honest with themselves. Ergo, a person lying to self has absolutely no issue lying to you...folks don't seem to understand that honesty is the best of all policies to follow, yet we rather lie and compound each lie with another...

What do you think? How many other brothers out here looking for love and wanting to be in a good happy relationship are finding themselves turning to women of other races because of the malleabilty and submission that women of other races are deemed to have.

Like I told him there are good black woment out here, he just hasn't met the right I am curious...what would you have said were you having this convo...?



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