3 Greatest Loves                                Recently I learned that we only experience 3 great loves of our lives. I had no idea because I’ve only experienced the first of those 2 loves and I hope before I die, I get to experience the 3 rd . What are the 3 greatest loves that we will experience? Young Love/First Love Our first of the three is that of young love or our first love. It is new and fresh and has our emotions all over the place. We are told that this type of love doesn’t last, but we all know high school sweethearts who have been together since high school or in some cases middle school. I had this experience with my high school sweetheart; it lasted 15yrs...until it didn't. . Toxic Love Our second love is that Toxic Love. It’s that love where there is always some sort of drama or contention and for whate...

The placement of the engagement ring has been a long held tradition of showing your status as no longer being available and it’s what some women secretly wish for when dating. However, there is a new trend.  The 2012 tend---the Man Engagement Ring or the MANGAGEMENT RING. Now some women feel that if he has to be managed, why would they want him? But, it’s not the fact that he is being managed, it is just showing that he is no longer on the market. That he is affianced. That he is betrothed. That he is taken! It’s a symbolic gesture like the diamond engagement ring for the women. It can be represented in a plain silver, titanium, or stainless steel band. Some women are even springing for Plain Platinum or gold, with an upgrade of adding diamonds for the ‘big day’. Yet when asked, more women had an issue with such a concept rather than men. Most men had no problem wearing a ‘management’ ring. They felt that it leveled the playing field somewhat. That if he ask...

Meeting a man is as easy as saying "excuse me...what's your name?" A phrase made famous by Hip-Hop Mogul Jay-Z, the intro to his smash hit Excuse Me Miss as he sidles up to a young lady that he found attractive. When it comes to dating, are you choosing a mate for you or are you more concerned about what your family and friends will think of your potential mate? Are women more concerned about this than men? Is this one of the factors keeping you single and/or dateless? Are you placing your potential mate under a microscope? Are you searching for flaws and judging the book by its cover? If you answered yes to any of these questions then it could quite possibly be one of the reasons why you are single? Ideally it is important that your mate is social enough that they will not pose a problem at an office party or family event, because none of us want to be embarrassed in front of those we love, respect, and trust. But as I watch women, especially women 35 a...

You meet him. You like him. You go on a date with him. The first date was the initial meet and greet, where you met for coffee after work. During that time you set up a second date to have dinner a couple of days later. It’s the night of the second date and you are having a fabulous time. Your checklist is getting checked-off, because so far he meets your basic requirements: looks, education, personality, charm, and charisma…but in the back of your mind, you have this niggling sensation about a conversation you recently overheard the women in your salon discussing. As you sat in your stylists chair you listened as they volleyed their dating woes and there was a consensus amongst them all that most men had this unspoken rule that if they took you out on three dates, then by the third date they expected you to sleep with them. You look into his eyes, trying to gauge his thoughts. Does he think like that? Will he expect something on the next date? Should I accept a next date, wi...

justwright-themovie.com Just Wright the new romantic comedy starring the divinely voluptuous Dana Owens aka Queen Latifah and rapper turned actor Common are explosive on the scene and have amazing chemistry. What turns into a chance meeting at a gas station leads to love but not with the one with the jiggly-bits, rather the stunningly beautiful best friend, played by Paula Patton (wife of R & B crooner Robin Thicke). This movie hits home to what some voluptuous women have had to deal with most of their lives…the skinny one got the guy. Or as they said in the movie “the girl who was supposed to get the guy did. The landscape of single, plus size African American women is just as large (no pun intended) if not more-so than the landscape of single, professional, black women. Society however states that in order for a woman to be beautiful and a great catch, she has to have a size 2 body. She has to be somewhat shallow and superficial and it matters not, so long as she is an arm charm....

"Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do." Dr. Spock That is a quote that people should always remember when it comes to all of their relationships. The relationship with your siblings, spouse, parents, children, family, and friends. Those are the most important relationships that you have in your life. We cultivate them. We nuture them. We instill values, principles, and morals in them. It is a quote that even I struggle to remember, but I remember, because trust is an important and imperitive part of all of my relationships. According to Merriam-Webster trust is a: assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something b : one in which confidence is placed The internet craze has placed our society on information overload. Too many of us place a confidence in what it is we find on the internet. Especially when it comes to finding love online. The billion dollar business of online dating is growing expone...

Who knew that the dating game would change so drastically over the last twenty years? So many factors play into what changed the game and I feel that the number factor was the internet? The internet made it easier for shy, introverted, sometimes unattractive, uninspiring, lazy, physically disabled and in some instances obese individuals the opportunity to meet a potential love match online. I know what I said is not politically correct, but it’s the ugly truth. On the other hand, it also made it easier for that busy executive and/or a workaholic, single parents, and newly single individuals to find a love match as well. Let’s face facts it’s a helluva lot easier to point, click, accept or reject via the anonymity of the internet as opposed to attending a singles event such as speed dating or a singles meet and greet. Sidebar: 35,000 people meet and marry online every year…which I am sure will give some folks hope. Ideally no one thought and/or believed they would be single again and/o...

I’ve been told by some men that I have met that I “think like a dude”, and that statement made me laugh, because I do have a “dudetality”. I am surrounded by women that have a “dudetality” and that’s alright! For those that don’t know me, I am outspoken and opinionated. I am very direct and at times I don’t have a filter between my brain and my tongue. I understand that it’s not what I say, but how I say it, however, I feel like people are coddled too damn much at times and they need to hear it straight with no chaser. Why pretty the words up or delay the blow? Some people try to play dumb and act like they don’t know and/or understand the words that are coming out of your mouth, especially if you’re being “nice” about it. Some people need to hear it in a rough manner in order for them to see the stupidity of their ways. For example…a few years ago I remember coming home and one of my sister’s girlfriends had stopped past for a visit. I did not care for this girl, so when I came in, I ...

Excerpt from forthcoming book... Sassy’s Rules of Dating 2009© SassyScribe (Saundra E. Harris) Saphari Books, Inc. The first rule of dating is to go on the date with no expectations. We as women set ourselves up when we go on a date with this mindset. Keep an open mind. Be charming and friendly. Do not send a representative in your stead, be your self, because any act or sham will come out later. Again this is something that took me four years to learn. When I date, I go on the date with one expectation, and that is to have fun. I enjoy the food, the conversation, the laughter, or whatever it is he has planned for the evening. Even if there is no love connection, I have opened up my life to a possible new acquaintance. There are some tried and true questions that one should ask on a date, most especially a first date. Truth be told, some questions should’ve been asked in advance. I firmly believe that when you meet a person, you can find out some things in the first twenty minutes o...

God blessed I love FB and all other social networking sites, because it allows me to be Sassy and speak my mind on topics I love... but most importantly it is a vessel that is allowing me to speak to women about their hangups and stupidty when it comes to men, dating, sex, and relationships. Yes, I said stupidity...it looks as if some of them are getting dumber and more desparate as they get older. You know when I hear them saying the same things over and over adnauseum it makes my teeth itch. Why? Why is it that women have not learned from their mistakes? Why are they still asking the same damn questions over and over...how do I know if he likes me, is he only after sex...why is he lying to me, why does't he want to spend time with me...WTF I can't take it anymore...Ladies, dating is so very easy...we have been blessed with a third eye and an uncanny intuition that talks to us everyday. Not just on matters of the heart but on all matters that involve, money, our children, our ...

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: SassyScribe Media Entertainment P.O. Box 232 Pasadena, MD 21123 sassyscribemediaent@yahoo.com IT’S JUST A DAMN DATE: Why We Expect Too Much Too Soon April 7, 2009, ( Baltimore , MD ): Sassy and Dlyte sit down with author Tariiq Omari Walton, and discuss his best selling book ITS JUST A DAMN DATE available at http://www.tariiqomari.com/ and why people expect too much too soon. Tune in Thursday, April 9, 2009, at 9:00pm EST / 6:00 PM PST on www.blogtalkradio.com/sassyentertainment and call in to share your thoughts to 646.716.7414. "A successful relationship is not something you can actively seek and expect to find, according to author Tariiq O. Walton" “WSER Sassy Entertainment Radio™” is a hypnotically engaging interactive radio show streaming live each and every Thursday on your Internet airwaves at 9:00pm EST/6:00pm PST. Saundra E. Harris, an Award winning author, turned talk show host aptly called “SassyScribe”, and Dlyte dishes a saucy discussion ...

Cynthia Nixon did it. Lindsay Lohan's doing it. TV shows are based on it. Is it our imaginations, or are wives and girlfriends ditching their men and falling in love with other women? New science says that sexuality is more fluid than we thought. Lately, a new kind of sisterly love seems to be in the air. In the past few years, Sex and the City's Cynthia Nixon left a boyfriend after a decade and a half and started dating a woman (and talked openly about it). Actress Lindsay Lohan and DJ Samantha Ronson flaunted their relationship from New York to Dubai. Katy Perry's song "I Kissed a Girl" topped the charts. The L Word, Work Out, and Top Chef are featuring gay women on TV, and there's even talk of a lesbian reality show in the works. Certainly nothing is new about women having sex with women, but we've arrived at a moment in the popular culture when it all suddenly seems almost fashionable — or at least, acceptable. Statistics on how many women have traded ...

This posting stemmed from a discussion about a man who spent a beautiful weekend with his wife and just the way in which he described the weekend prompted the women on the board to state how lucky his wife is to have a loving, caring, and attentive brother such as GRUMPY...it was so on point, that I asked him if I could post it on my blogs...and his response was "if it helps one woman to make the right decision, then hell yeah, post on!" Here is his response for women...please take heed... ___________________________________________ I would say to the women who claim they want that: WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ACHIEVE THAT? Meaning, what kind of man are you dealing with? Under what circumstances are you with him? If it's because he's all you think you can get or because he's the baby daddy or because he's brainwashed you into thinking that 'ain't nobody else gonna want you' or anything like that, then you won't get that. Women are like a dealer in a ...

How much of your sexual history should you disclose to a mate? For some women this question remains a constant conflict because how much of the reveal is too much? I advocate truth telling, although we all know that there are some that live in their convoluted and distorted truth. But, in this day and time, it is vitally imperative to your health and welfare to always state the truth. As adults we understand that you may not want to reveal all...that at one point in our lives we may have done something that was a little wild and/or off the hook and some things you just may decide to take to the grave. But years ago, you know back in the day when dating was easier and fun, you didn't have the issues that you have today. The questions that individuals must ask today are not questions that you had to ask twenty years ago. Today we have to ask questions like: Are you currently sexually active? If so, how many partners are you intimate with? Have you ever have or currently have a sexual...

June 19th @ 9pm EST/6pm PST - Sassy & Dlyte welcome Valerie Gibson best selling author of COUGAR: AN OLDER WOMANS GUIDE TO DATING YOUNGER MEN, as well as a noted relationship and sex therapist to discuss the pro's and con's of this dating lifestyle. Visit http://www.valeriegibson.com/ to learn more or www.blogtalkradio.com/sassyentertainment to set a reminder for the show. About The Author (taken directly from author's website) Valerie Gibson is a well known and popular Canadian celebrity and was for 12 years the award-winning sex and relationships columnist for the Toronto Sun newspaper, Toronto, Canada. An author, radio and television personality and speaker across Canada and the U.S., Valerie is considered one of North America’s top experts on contemporary love, sex, relationships and dating. She is currently the relationships expert for the new afternoon CBC television lifestyle show Steven and Chris featuring hosts Steven Sabados and Chris Hyndman, the original D...

At one point in our lives, everyone has had their heartbroken and/or broken someone's heart. We have been in great relationships that for some reason didn't work and we have been in bad relationships that were destined to fail from the beginning, however, as much as folks say that they wish they had that special someone in their lives, what are they willing to do to get that person? Are they willing to be open and free letting folks in or are they holding off and holding back for fear of being hurt. Are we so desensitized now that folks are no longer saying that their hearts are being broken, rather than their feelings were bruised, because bruise is better than broken. That your heart is still somewhat intact althought it may have a slight crack, it can heal quicker... When listening to issues from women and some men, I have come to the conclusion that as much as men and women say they want that special someone in their life WE {women/men} don't seem willing to let our gu...

WOW! I am a cougar or so states the social commentators for women over 35 or is it 40 that date younger men. I do not see myself as a cougar, because I do not openly nor actively seek younger men...they seek me out! I feel pretty damn good because of that...and I enjoy the company of younger men, not younger fools, but men that are focused and accomplished in their own right...besides old men have been pursuing younger women for years...isn't it time for the tables to turn? Chime in on the discussion... SassyScribe

As a woman I do not believe that I have all of the answers…hell, I just feel that I follow my instinct about men and it has enabled or equipped me with a sense of discernment that I honestly did not have four years ago. In my opinion [and my blogs are just that] dating is not very hard and/or as complicated as folks would like people to believe. On Saturday, March 29th, I facilitated a discussion entitle Technology and Dating- has it helped or hindered the dating process? [blog written Dec ‘07] http://xcapadesofthegirlz.blogspot.com/2007/12/technology-dating.html And it amazed me that out of the fifteen or so individuals in the room, only two of them were dating, and that was myself and one other woman. We discussed the pro’s and con’s of online dating, the high number of individuals that are meeting and marrying online [30k/annually], the ratio of men to women online, the percentage of married men online [40%] and that 72% of women are more likely to find a lover from an online conn...

Monday, March 3, 2008, I was a guest panelist along with Martina Evans, on THE FRONT PAGE, with host Craig Thompson, on WEAA 88.9 Morgan State Radio. The topic under discussion was dating and relationships...and I have to thank Martina Evans, the author of Worst First Dates and the Lessons Learned, for thinking of and inviting me to appear along with her. However, I have been thinking about what some of the callers...one them stated that she was 46yo and "that nowadays all a man wishes to do is take you back to his home and screw." We touched on this that night and unfortunately, we were unable to delve deeper into the topic. As I continue with research and viewing the breakdown in communication in the dating process I can see how she would get that mindset. It is my belief and opinion that some women are just making it too damn easy for some men. Don't get me wrong there are women that are more than willing to give it up the first time around, but for most men to automat...

The 1995 Box office hit “WAITING TO EXHALE” , told the story of four African American women, one married with an impending divorce, one a single mother, and two single women both struggling in relationships with lothario’s and married men. I watched that movie again this morning (3am) and it got me to thinking…How many women are still “waiting to exhale”? How many of them are still waiting for “the one”…”the knight in shining armor”…their soul mate, the one person who really and truly loves, cherishes and understands them. That one person who can finish their sentence, make their heart race, that one person who would do anything for them…no questions asked. I’ve seen this movie at least 100 times, but this time…it moved me to tears. Angela Bassett lying in Wesley Snipes arms saddened and pissed over her impending divorce. Loretta Divine crying to Gregory Hines over her son leaving to tour Europe and her admitting that he had been the man in her life and how unfair it was of her to burd...