At one point in our lives, everyone has had their heartbroken and/or broken someone's heart. We have been in great relationships that for some reason didn't work and we have been in bad relationships that were destined to fail from the beginning, however, as much as folks say that they wish they had that special someone in their lives, what are they willing to do to get that person? Are they willing to be open and free letting folks in or are they holding off and holding back for fear of being hurt. Are we so desensitized now that folks are no longer saying that their hearts are being broken, rather than their feelings were bruised, because bruise is better than broken. That your heart is still somewhat intact althought it may have a slight crack, it can heal quicker... When listening to issues from women and some men, I have come to the conclusion that as much as men and women say they want that special someone in their life WE {women/men} don't seem willing to let our gu...

WOW! I am a cougar or so states the social commentators for women over 35 or is it 40 that date younger men. I do not see myself as a cougar, because I do not openly nor actively seek younger men...they seek me out! I feel pretty damn good because of that...and I enjoy the company of younger men, not younger fools, but men that are focused and accomplished in their own right...besides old men have been pursuing younger women for years...isn't it time for the tables to turn? Chime in on the discussion... SassyScribe

As a woman I do not believe that I have all of the answers…hell, I just feel that I follow my instinct about men and it has enabled or equipped me with a sense of discernment that I honestly did not have four years ago. In my opinion [and my blogs are just that] dating is not very hard and/or as complicated as folks would like people to believe. On Saturday, March 29th, I facilitated a discussion entitle Technology and Dating- has it helped or hindered the dating process? [blog written Dec ‘07] http://xcapadesofthegirlz.blogspot.com/2007/12/technology-dating.html And it amazed me that out of the fifteen or so individuals in the room, only two of them were dating, and that was myself and one other woman. We discussed the pro’s and con’s of online dating, the high number of individuals that are meeting and marrying online [30k/annually], the ratio of men to women online, the percentage of married men online [40%] and that 72% of women are more likely to find a lover from an online conn...

This popped up on a message board that I talk on...yet it is so very appropriate for my show topic tomorrow...its a letter a black man wrote about why he cheated on his wife... I found this interesting to say the least...he touched on some points that I have heard some men make, but does that excuse the behavior? What are your thoughts on this... ______________________________________________________________ *Why I Cheat on My Beautiful Black Wife I am a black man and a cheater. Not all the time, just every now and then. The itch comes to me, and no matter what my wife does, I still can't help but want another woman. At least for a night, or two, or three. I love my wife very much. No woman I've ever met or will meet will hold a more important place in my life. I also love my kids, our house, my job and the fish in my daughter's room. I love everything about my life at home, even though my relationship has become dull and rocky. But while I love having a strong black family...

With the onslaught of the perceived "man shortage" women are beginning to focus their attentions on men from their friends past. Meaning that they are revising their opinions of the once staunchly forbidden and "possibly" offensive rule of not dating your girlfriends exes/baby daddies/or jump-offs, maintenance men, or friends-with-benefits. In other words, if your girl had sexual relations/dealings of any kind, then he is unspokeningly off-limits to her posse/homegirls/sister gurls. Your homegirls/sistagirls especially know that he is now in an untouchable, a forever untouchable position, regardless of how sexy, or fine, or how much the two of you may have "vibed" with one another, he can't be touched. Yet as women are growing older and the pool for eligible men is supposedly shrinking, they are mulling over whether or not to date an old flame of their friends. Statistics show that African American women are the most uncoupled women on earth, to wit it...

Why is it when a man says he is looking to settle down, he is viewed as being tired of the game? Yet when a woman says she is ready to settle down because of the same reasoning, she is now viewed as being desperate or in a rush to marry. Why is it that women are expected to forgive a cheating/philandering husband, yet a man is not expected to forgive a cheating/philandering wife? Why is it an expectation that a woman will stand by her man regardless of his misdeed? Why is it that single men who right/talk about relationships are viewed as giving sound advice, yet a single woman that does the same is viewed as being bitter and angry? Why is it that a man who engages in multiple relationships is just a man “doing his thang”, yet a woman doing the same is a whore? We are bombarded with various forms of media that continue to support this double standard. Let’s start with the most recent case of Governor Spitzer from NY who ran for public office vowing to eradicate crime and here he transp...

Monday, March 3, 2008, I was a guest panelist along with Martina Evans, on THE FRONT PAGE, with host Craig Thompson, on WEAA 88.9 Morgan State Radio. The topic under discussion was dating and relationships...and I have to thank Martina Evans, the author of Worst First Dates and the Lessons Learned, for thinking of and inviting me to appear along with her. However, I have been thinking about what some of the callers...one them stated that she was 46yo and "that nowadays all a man wishes to do is take you back to his home and screw." We touched on this that night and unfortunately, we were unable to delve deeper into the topic. As I continue with research and viewing the breakdown in communication in the dating process I can see how she would get that mindset. It is my belief and opinion that some women are just making it too damn easy for some men. Don't get me wrong there are women that are more than willing to give it up the first time around, but for most men to automat...

Found another one thanks to my man SoulChild...who happens to be my personal web guru...mucho gracias~ http://health.yahoo.com/experts/menlovesex/73762/why-men-dont-talk/ Why Men Don't Talk As the editor of the biggest men's magazine in the world, I am privy to something many women rarely hear - straightforward, uninhibited guy talk. Don't be so shocked - guys do actually talk, and not just about Tom Brady's quarterback rating. Most women think their man is the strong, silent type (or maybe the oblivious, silent type), and they wonder why he doesn't share his feelings. But here's the truth: Men do want to open up, about their hopes, their fears, and their passions. Yet put him alone in a room with you, and he often turns into a Sphinx. Why can't he take his eyes off the TV and talk about the state of the relationship, or the finances, or, heck, the backyard landscaping? Why in the world can't he just summarize his day for 10 minutes? In fact, one in fi...

Interesting find online... -------------------------------------------- http://health.yahoo.com/experts/m...sex/78433/what-makes-a-man-marry/ What Makes a Man Marry? I have a friend who spent two weeks in Europe with his girlfriend, and some of it didn't go too well. He didn't like the haircut she got pre-trip. She didn't like the way his eye wandered on the streets of Paris. They fought some. So when my friend got back home, he asked a wise friend (no, certainly not me) what he should do. Here's the advice he got: Every relationship is going to come up against some obstacles. They'll either break it up, or make it stronger. If it ends, it wasn't meant to be. If you push through, the relationship will be better than ever. That's stuck with me for a long time, in part because my friend is now 21 years into marriage with that one-time girlfriend. So I'm just guessing that their relationship grew stronger when they faced obstacles. What made the differenc...

So your gut instinct was right...you found out he cheated, so now what do you do? Many of your friends will tell you to leave him, but the majority of women will not leave after the first time they find out that their mate has cheated. To be honest, the majority of women stay, rather its for love or lifestyle, they very rarely leave. I know so many so-called married folks that on the surface appear to be happy and beneath they are both cheating neither getting what it is they want from the other, so rather than separate they step out and come back. A revolving door of random individuals throughtout their relationship. I've heard men say they stay because of the children, as if that situation is ideal for the kids. Is it ideal if their is no sign of affection between the parents? What is that teaching and/or showing the children? What if the parents are constantly fighting, sniping, griping, and back biting one another...what does that show? Shouldn't the children know what its ...

The 1995 Box office hit “WAITING TO EXHALE” , told the story of four African American women, one married with an impending divorce, one a single mother, and two single women both struggling in relationships with lothario’s and married men. I watched that movie again this morning (3am) and it got me to thinking…How many women are still “waiting to exhale”? How many of them are still waiting for “the one”…”the knight in shining armor”…their soul mate, the one person who really and truly loves, cherishes and understands them. That one person who can finish their sentence, make their heart race, that one person who would do anything for them…no questions asked. I’ve seen this movie at least 100 times, but this time…it moved me to tears. Angela Bassett lying in Wesley Snipes arms saddened and pissed over her impending divorce. Loretta Divine crying to Gregory Hines over her son leaving to tour Europe and her admitting that he had been the man in her life and how unfair it was of her to burd...

It’s no secret that for the past six years my sister and my two cousins, and I throw a fabulously hot Valentine’s Day Party. Its live, off the hook, and interactive, with games, food, music, and prizes…there are sample drinks passed out each hour…a chocolate fountain with huge California vine ripened succulent strawberries…and a wide array of other desserts and delectable morsels. There is a good time had by all, young and the young at heart. We do discriminate with ticket sales because we only want the Grown & Sexy in attendance…the exception we make is for the parents and aunts and uncles…hell, they taught us how to throw a party…how to get different groups to mix and mingle and stop sitting around all bougie and shyt. But as I write this I am perplexed…Why is it that the word Valentine tends to scare and/or invoke a fear in people? Is it an admission or an acceptance of their own loneliness? I wonder? You know I’ve been throwing this party for six years with no date and when I h...

Too many times I listen to women talk about how a man has done them wrong…and I hear men talking about how women aren’t being honest, or women don’t know what it is that they want…but ladies, do men really and truly know what they want? Hell no! Men say they want a woman that’s a freak in the bed, a good cook, independent, fun to be around, does not nag , allows him his space, and is a good mother…for some men that have this it still appears to not be enough… Men you may not like this, but what Tyler Perry wrote in his movie “Why Did I Get Married” about that 80/20 rule and that you are only going to get 80% of what you need or want in a person, but because folks are still searching and think they have found something better in that 20% person they go for it…then guess what…that 20% person wasn’t as great as they thought. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side…sometimes its full of rocks...but men have to find out the hard way. You saw how it played out in the movie…it plays...

FEBRUARY 2008 SHOW Show Schedule www.blogtalkradio.com/SASSYENTERTAINMENT - 646.716.7414 Thursday, February 7th @ 9pm - Men & Women Are Built Differently - Do you believe that men and women are built differently when it comes to sex...do you think an uninhibited woman is a whore...do you think women that have casual sex or one night stands are using this as a defense mechanism to stave off the ills of being hurt? ***Wednesday, February 13th @ 9pm*** (Special Valentine's Show) - WHY DID HE BREAK UP WITH ME? - Have you ever been dumped and all you were left with was the lingering question, "Why did he break up with me?" What woman hasn't been there? Special Guest DeBora Ricks, author of Love Addicted will dish the dirt with Sassy! This show is not to be missed because everyone has a story to tell... Thursday, February 21st @9pm - HOMOSEXUALITY & THE BLACK COMMUNITY - The community abhores it...the church scorns and shuns it, the family is ashamed of it, and f...

I don't think its a secret that I have been a fan of Senator Barack Obama since he spoke at the DNC in 2004...since then I have been following his career...and it is my hope that he receives the nomination for President. That is why it still bothers me when I hear that blacks are divided in their decision between Obama & Clinton. So when I received this in an email, and although I did not write this piece below, I was compelled to share it...enjoy! When Black is Enough Please, make me a believer! I must confess, I feel that in being a Barack Obama supporter I have missed something or as the media portrays…I have missed everything the Clinton's have done for me, a black woman in America. Since I am truly a socialite at heart who hates to miss an event, let alone a decade of the African-American migration to a better life; please can someone?...Anyone? Tell me what exactly the Clinton's have done for black people that has made our loyalty so steadfast and unwavering! Or a...

Have you thought about how your relationship with your father has affected your current relationships with men? Are you seeking a father figure, someone to mold you and show you that they love you through patience and guidance? Or rather a bad boy that leads (in your mind) an exciting and exhilerating life---a risk taker that leaves you breathless with excitement? Maybe your safe, and because money was tight growing up you seek a man that can offer you the security and stability that you need knowing that although he may not be what you want emotionally, he is what you need to give you that sense of security. Have you wondered why you interact with men the way in which you do? Do you ever reflect on how your current relationships with men is a direct reflection of your relationship with your father? These questions have been floating in my head for quie some time as I reflect on how my relationship with my own father affects my relationships with men. I have a fantastic and loving rela...

Can you cry under water?________________________________________ How important does a person have to be before they are consideredassassinated instead of just murdered?________________________________________ Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for yourthoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?________________________________________ Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buriedin for eternity?________________________________________ Why does a round pizza come in a square box?________________________________________ What disease did cured ham actually have?________________________________________ How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be agood idea to put wheels on luggage?________________________________________ Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up likeevery two hours?________________________________________ If a de...

You know, I have been in a bytchy, pissy ass, mood for the last couple of days…just stupid, asinine shyt that folks do have really pissed me off…phew…I need to breathe! I am a Starbucks fiend, and for Christmas a friend gave me a $50 gift card…so I stop each morning on my way to work, its part of my routine…for the past couple of months there has been a woman that sits outside in her car and you’d think that she was a customer, but no, she is one of those individuals that really gets next to me… See I know this is going to piss folks off, but this woman is a Witness…a Jehovah Witness…this woman and folks like her get to me…for several reasons, one of them is that I feel, and these are just my opinions, but they push their religion on you, by trying to get you to purchase their little booklet or whatever ---oooooh The Watchtower or Watch Light whatever, anyway, every morning she sees me and every mooring I say “no thanks” and keep it moving.. But this morning, being in the mood that I a...

The infamous Grumpy, moderator extraodinaire of the FAF board, who is always thinking about educationing the ladies...ran across this site and relayed it to me...and now I am sharing it with you! I think this should be a part of a woman's daily regime...but that is JMO! _______________________________________________________ http://www.mypleasure.com/educati...gels_for_better_sexual_health.asp Kegels for Better Sexual Health Ladies, did you know you could perform an internal vaginal exercise that will strengthen the walls of your vagina, making childbirth easier, incontinence more unlikely and orgasms much stronger? If you've had a baby, your doctor probably told you all about these exercises, called Kegels. The rest of you, listen up. A Practical Application Developed in 1946 by Dr. Arnold Kegel (pronounced, "kay-gill"), a Los Angeles obstetrician and gynecologist, Kegels are the rhythmic clenching and unclenching of the pubococcygeal (PC) muscles. Also known as t...

WOW! 2008 has arrived... I want to wish you all a Blessed & Prosperous New Year! As I prepared for the new year, and a new phase in my life I struggled with where to begin. Unlike alot of people, 2007 was a great year for me...I enjoyed alot of success and a few failurers...I met new people that helped me in my growing process and removed myself from some old ones that were attempting to hold me back. I lost some family members near and dear to me, a wonderful aunt, cousin, and uncle in that order...these losses pulled my family closer together, making us stronger, caring, and more loving than ever. However, I was still not sure of what my "resolution" for the year 2008 would be, until I ran across this message board posting from the mighty and wise Grumpy from the FAF board... Didi & UB will know whom it is I am talking about...the message is about A C C E P T A N C E...and that is my New Years Resolution... _________________ One of the greatest causes of our unhappi...