I am single, and I think that having companionship, love, and intimacy are one of the strong points of being married. Here I am spending another holiday alone, as I watch with envious eyes as my married friends celebrate as a unit. When I tell them that I value what it is they have and would like to have that myself one day, I get these strange looks like "please, its not all that". I'm told that folks would give their eye teeth to be like me for one day. Single and Free...I say go for it...see how much fun it is not to have a confidant to take you through the good and bad times...see how much fun it is to always know that each memorable moment in your life, your birthday, holidays, and other family/friend gatherings that you may go to- you will always go alone. So in a conversation I told them jokingly, that if the marriage had been a true contract of stipulations say marriages must last a minimum of ten years prior to renewing your contract. That each renewal year had t...

I have been sitting here, thinking about sex as I do most days, and this thought popped into my head... Is Oral Sex - Sex? If there is no penetration of the vaginal cavity and all you do or have done is oral sex...is it sex? It makes me think of former President Clinton when he said "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" well in a sense, isn't he right...she performed oral sex on him...he did not penetrate her at all. So did they have sex or were they just fooling around? I'm just asking because a friend said if he isn't in a womans "hot box" then he didn't have sex...another friend said "eatin' ain't cheatin"...it makes me go hmmmm so please...leave your comment's and thoughts... SassyScribe

As a woman, I have to say I know that am serious about a man, when I start cooking for him and wanting to ensure his daily happiness. I know some women think/feel if they sleep with a man, then they are serious...for others it is calling you and talking to you everyday, the anticipation of hearing your voice is climatic. We all have our own ideals as to what makes up want to get serious with him/her, and as a woman I can see the signs in other women, but not quite as adept at seeing it in men. I don't know...to each his own, but when I asked a fellow male friend of mine how can a woman tell if a man is getting serious about her, he stated: "When he starts thinking (and saying) that the male friends that you had before you met him, are now trying to hit it. Or when he needs to know your every move, where you're going and whom you're with?" I thought that was funny, because to me that isn't serious, its paranoia! Again its all about preference... Howe...

I know this may be repetitive, but it bares repeating... For me there is nothing more satisfying nor more gratifying than orally pleasuring my man! I just don't understand how a sista could not willing fall to her knees before and submit to him everyday! Ladies...imagine going home, preparing yourself and as soon as he walks in the door, you surprise him. Hell, treat his azz like the GodFather, and do him a favor...everyday you do a favor for him and he will appreciate it...Some men deserve it for being the good men that they are... But know this gentlemen, just because this blog focuses on the men, doesn't mean that WE (women) should be neglected by you in this area....every woman deserves it as well. But I write this not for my love of oral pleasure, but because of the oral nazi's I hear about. How in the hell can you not make love to your S.O. in this way? Trust me, I ain't lying beside a man that won't do me...at least I won't lay beside him for long...be...

I have been sitting back and reviewing some of my topics and I am cracking the hell up. Women and Men are so very strange! Its almost similar to what they teach you in diversity classes, that underneath the outside differences, on the inside we all want the same things...but that may work for the races, but does it work for men and women? I see women trying to hold on to men for dear life. In my humble opinion, they meet men, and lets be honest women in the late 30's and above are not looking for too many men friends. I mean, when a woman initially meets a man, she begins to"size" him up as a potential, then once they have conversation, she will either move on, or she will stick around because of the potential that she sees. Now on the other hand, this man just met a woman and he might be lucky enough to have sex with her...that is as far as he has thought. He ain't worried about later on the next day or next week with her...he is in the moment. The here and now! Whil...

I was sitting here thinking about some of the trifling men folk in my family and it got me to thinking...would I have enough love and compassion in my heart to care for an ex or a philandering spouse/S.O. that required constant medical attention. I have a couple of cousins that have done alot of dirt that I have seen/heard to the women in their lives. One in particular had a habit of leaving his woman not for a quick stick-n-move type of affair, naw his azz had to linger with his side pieces for years at a clip. Now lets fast forward, this woman has continued to remain married to him, never straying, always attending family events and being "the good little wife"...and what got me was after all of these years, his azz got sick, his "woman" kicked him to the curb, and his wife is now caring for him. That type of love and committment to me is the sign of a good woman or is she completely stupid! There is no way in hell, that I would take care of your ailing azz after ...

I ran across this article and its food for thought...read on, and tell me what you think. ___________________________________________________ Can Marriage Stem African American Poverty?Study: Marriage benefits blacks economicallyBy Tamara E. Holmes December 4, 2006 -- Marriage appears to contribute greatly to the economic status of African American families, according to a new study, The Consequences of Marriage for African Americans, but some black advocates disagree on whether marriage programs are effective methods of curbing poverty. The study, commissioned by the Institute for American Values, a private nonprofit think tank that studies families, examines the consequences of marriage among African Americans in the last few decades. A recent panel discussion titled, "Marriage and the African-American Community" at the Brookings Institute in Washington, D.C., reviewed the study's findings. "On virtually every indicator of economic well-being, married African Ameri...

Do you talk to yourself? Am I the only one that has regular conversations with myself on what/how I can improve myself? I don't know if many folks will admit to it, but I think this is a natural part of maturation... As I grow older, and obtain a little more wisdom and outlook on the grand scheme of life, I notice that I am not the same woman that I was last year, or even yesterday. Everyday I find out something new, exciting, and different about ME!! Not only do I learn more about myself, I also see the growth of some of the individuals that are in my core group of friends. Sadly, some of us will never grow up and out of old habits, but the majority of us seem to balance L I F E and all that it entails... I think growth is good...do you? SassyScribe

I was having a conversation with one of my nephews babies momma and I found out that she recently miscarried. This is very upsetting altogether at the loss of life. I expressed my condolences, and personally I feel its for the best, because she can barely take care of the one she has, let alone bring another life into the struggle. Now as sad as that is, it made me think...hmmm this chick is still having unprotected and unsafe sex. Condoms cost about $10.00, a baby, over $100k in a lifetime, if not more, and the cocktails for HIV/AIDS are atronomical...WTF is she thinking? She barely knows the dude and in less than six months she trusts him enough to have him not wear a condom. When I asked her, she said "he told me he wasn't sleeping with anyone else" now be that as it may, because it may be true, why, why, why, did she think that him telling her so made him CLEAN! What about all of the other women he slept with prior to you, for that matter what about the men you've...

Would you marry someone because you wanted kids? Why would you marry or settle for someone that you didn't love? Is it that you are/were tired of looking and searching and you settled for the first bus smoking? Were you that lonely that you took whatever, whenever, however, from whomever? I ask because I know of so many people that are married and so very soon after the marriage they begin to stray. Look for other avenues of release OR the killer is that they never let their side piece go and went into the marriage just plain wrong! I see a level of pervasiveness that appears to be accepted among society. Its like they know from jump that this may be their last or only chance so they jump. They leap before they truly look and now they are stuck...and mad....as they ask themselves, "why did I marry him/her?" Its too late for that now...you (women) wanted that damn day that is supposedly our right in life! A huge fancy ass wedding that you will be paying for like a damn stu...

How long does a person need to know whether or not you are going to fit into their life? Their future? Maybe its the extremest in me...I wasted 15 years of my life with a man that I knew with every fiber of my being that he wasn't responsible enough for me to marry or have children with. Don't get me wrong, I loved him, oh how I loved that man, through his lack of employment, his habit forming vices, his carelessness for preparing for his/our future...but I was a mere child of 17 when we got together, and I was 32 when I left. That was my entire youth gone! Time gone!!! My eyes eventually opened and my mind said "its time to go". I know now that I stayed because I knew he wasn't responsible and that he would not take care of himself without me. I knew that he needed money for food, clothes, rent, water, etc... Its been 6 years since I left him and I absolutely refuse to waste my time on anyone anymore. Sure, we can go out to the movies, dinner, dancing, and drinks...

Are you an uninhibited lover, where anything goes and I'll try anything once type of lover...or are you more reserved, not really open to new and different things. Is an uninhibited person scarey to you? Do you consider them freaks? What constitutes a freak? Is there a limit to your freakiness...I mean I know I've asked this question a thousand times before, but I want to know...is there a limit to your freakiness? Is there anything that you just flat out won't do? Threesomes...Exhibitionism...S & M...Bondage (light bondage)...food...what is it that you can't see yourself doing? What is that you can't wait to do or try with someone, hell with yourself...Come on yall...stop playing and be real. We are all adults and when we try to sit back and act like we haven't done this, that or the other, we are lying. Yes, I keep bringing this up, because folks keep lying. Don't lie to me...admit that you're a freak...hell everyone has a different definition as t...

Have you ever thought about sexing your ex(es)? I mean when you sit and think about how they made you feel...how they touched you just right...how they tasted you just right. How their body stroked, caressed, licked, hmmmm...just the way they used to----hmmmm! They new all of the spots to hit and found new ones that you didn't know existed. I mean they took their time to ensure that your loving was good. It was slow at times, lazy type of love...sometimes it was that frenzied type of love---hot monkey sex type! Have you ever thought about sleeping with an ex again? For those of you that haven't, would you? Nothing permanent, something that you needed just for old times sake...you know nostalgia. LOL I mean it is like Dave Hollister says in his song One Woman Man "...seeing you reminds me of, all the nights I used to beat it up..." remember ladies...how he she used to make your toes curl, and you screamed out...damn! Fellas yall aren't exempt, there have been some ...

At the eve of my 39th Thanksgiving, I have to pause and give thanks for my many, many blessings. I am so very blessed to have been born and raised in a loving home with two parents, one brother, and three sisters. They loved me and always encouraged me to be the best at whatever it is I choose to do. I am blessed in the love, caring, and support that they have given me through all of my trials, tribulations, joys, and sorrows. I have to add to that the love and support that I get from my extended family, not to mention my true true friends. I want to take this time to thank you all for being there for me! I know that at times I can be rude, brisk, tactless, moody, angry, bitchy, irate, irritable, and at times obnoxious and intolerable, and yet you all continue to love me. You don't hesitate to put me in my place when I become "more than the average human" can bare. To the readers of my books and the blogs, thank you for reading the my daily ramblings! I really appreciate ...

I was sitting here and my mind went to sex, and I have to try this out... If I ask nicely, will you undress me slowly, peeling my clothing from me inch by seductive inch, exposing my coffee colored body to your lustful eyes. If I ask nicely, will your your mouth covet my neck with your sighs, will your lips suck my dusky brown tipped nipples? I can't wait to feel his tongue in and on my body Hmmm, I'm wondering... If I ask nicely, will you trace your tongue around my navel, slowly moving downward to my clit, lapping at my juices that are flowing from my body? If I asked nicely, would you tie me up and make me your slave? Please say yes daddy...just for the night? I asked nicely, would you phuck me in every orifice allowed my man and some that aren't? If I asked nicely, would you climb upon my sweat slickened body and slowly insert yourself inside me? Would you thrust long and hard, slow and deep, fast and short? If I asked nicely, would you grind into my body slowly, and de...

What happens when a woman takes herself in hand and just stops phucking...? She just stop slams off the head, the azz, the puzzy, every orifice on her body is closed...what happens? What happens when she is dating? Does she continue to date? Will he continue to call her? Nawww...I'm afraid not ladies...I think when you shut the body off, not only do you find yourself and your worth...but you also find out who likes you. If a man says, "If you ain't phucking, I'm ducking." Then you know whats up...don't get mad or upset, just smile and keep it moving. Yeah, I know that statement is a little crass...but such is life... Puzzy to men is like money to women...its a necessity and a hot commodity...a friend just told me...and he went on to state: It is hard for a man to understand the inner surface of a woman, or her worth, because he always sees the outer surface first. And since we are so simple and shallow, it takes time for the inner surface to register in our th...

A woman said to me that she didn't feel like she was good enough to "snag" a man. I looked at her stunned and thought Hmmm...what exactly is good enough? Is her education not good enough? Her financial situation? Her looks? Her Weight? What? I mean there are more and more women living the single life, some by choice, circumstance, some just haven't learned to know themselves well enough to get a special someone. But this puzzled me, because I hear all the time men and women say that she is a fantastic girl, but , or he is a great guy, but . BUT WHAT? What is it that everyone is on this fantastic search for in a person. As I write this I get angrier and angrier because I can hear folks saying that they want someone but they don't know what it is they want. What the piss is that? Or they say I know what he/she looks like, smell like, feel like, taste like, yet everyone the meet doesn't look right, or feel right, or smell right, or taste right...etc, etc, etc.....

Is it possible to remain friends with your ex? I wondered about this question, because although I hear people saying that they would have no problem remaining friendly with an ex, my question is why? If you don't have any financial ties with each other or children, I find it rather odd to just be friends with an ex. Maybe its me and my issues of letting things go, but when I'm done, I'm done. I don't need daily conversation with you via email, phone, or text messages, nor do I need updates on you and your life from family and friends. When its over its over...it is called a break up for a reason is it not?!?!?!? If your ex is around and/or constantly in your ear/face can you move forward with another person? Is it possible that it may make moving forward harder because you don't want to hurt the feelings of your ex (feelings should already be hurt, because you broke up)? Is it possible that maybe the ex is thinking that you have left open the doors of communication ...

This was sent to me...the author is unknown... If you're not married yet, share this with a friend. If you are married, share it with your spouse or other married couples and reflect on it. An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open, and after you marry, close one eye." Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem, make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really important. Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws, vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more obvious. If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve, you've got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing bother you. You and your mate have many different expectations, ...

Have you ever been torn between one of more individuals? Is it truly possible to love more than one person at the same time...? I have a friend that is currently torn between three men...all of the men are successful in their respective careers, and they have great personalities and are terrific fathers. Her dilimma is that the first man, she knows deep within in her heart that he will never give her the relationship nor the love that she wants from him. At times he can be cynical when it comes to women, and gives the belief that so long as a woman is sexing him, whomever else she is with isn't an issue for him. Also believes in threesomes..etc..BTW, they talk daily... The second man she's known a little over four years and is considerate, funny, and successful, but she says for some reason he continues to hold himself back from her. Oh yeah, they talk everyday... The third man she met in April of this year. He too is great, a fantastic, kind, considerate lover, and a loving an...